16 Words That Mean Something Totally Different To Musicians

Can you Handel this list, or will you have to turn Bach?

1. Reception

Twitter: @themusicalmuse

What it usually means: A social occasion after a recital where one might congratulate the performer.

What it means to classical musicians: A free-for-all food frenzy that you feel you've earned after sitting through two hours of new music.

2. Accompanist

matjhayes / instagram.com

What it usually means: A person who provides musical accompaniment.

What it means to classical musicians: A person who deserves the utmost respect for saving your ass when you make mistakes and putting up with your general craziness.

3. Practice

Twitter: @WriteMeADream

What it usually means: Repeated exercise in a particular skill in order to become proficient.

What it means to classical musicians: The reason you spend 4-5 hours a day locked in a room, and also the reason you have no social life.

4. Exposure

Twitter: @stickyalbums

What it usually means: Being introduced or subjected to something.

What it means to classical musicians: What some people think it's OK to pay you in.

5. Page-turner

FLMusikakademie / youtube.com

What it usually means: Someone who turns pages for you.

What it means to classical musicians: Someone who holds the fate of your recital's success in their potentially clumsy hands.

6. Teacher

Sony Pictures Classics / daystune.com

What it usually means: A person who educates people and helps them learn new things.

What it means to classical musicians: A figure that instills both great respect and crippling fear inside you.

7. Solo

katryreynolds / instagram.com

What it usually means: A thing done by one person only.

What it means to classical musicians: A chance to show off your fancy cadenza and all the skills you've mastered, after you overcome the paralyzing stage fright.

8. Conduct

Twitter: @MercuryClassics

What it usually means: The act of managing an activity or organization.

What it means to classical musicians: The act of zeroing in on the person who fucked up and staring at them until they feel uncomfortable.

9. Counterpoint

Twitter: @DJ_Booradley

What it usually means: An argument or idea used to create a contrast with the main theme.

What it means to classical musicians: The class where you have a ton of red marks on your homework because you missed that fucking parallel fifth, goddammit.

10. Staff

Twitter: @MezzoMariaLopez

What it usually means: The people who are employed by a particular organization.

What it means to classical musicians: That thing you cannot draw straight or evenly to save your life.

11. Sleep

mikhailpais / instagram.com

What it usually means: An act of rest that usually occurs at night.

What is means to classical musicians: Something that you have to get in 10-minute bursts between rehearsals.

12. Composer

awkwardpanda94 / John Stump / instagram.com

What it usually means: Someone who writes music, such as Bach, Mozart, or Schumann.

What it means to classical musicians: Your slightly pretentious friend who might actually being trying to kill all musicians with his ~experimental~ compositions.

13. Audition

Universal Pictures / noyoureoutoforder.tumblr.com

What it usually means: An interview featuring a practical skill, such as singing, dancing, acting, or playing.

What it means to classical musicians: An event that puts your stomach in knots because everything is riding on it and it could literally CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

14. Instrument

sophiaschmitzpro / instagram.com

What it usually means: An object or device used to produce musical sounds.

What it means to classical musicians: The source of your joy, your pain, and your income. Basically, your child.

15. Poster

mfrigolettophotography / instagram.com

What it usually means: A large printed picture used for decoration.

What it means to classical musicians: Something for which you have to be both funny and hot in a desperate attempt to fill seats at your recital.

16. Music

raychenviolin / instagram.com

What it usually means: Vocal or instrumental sounds produced in such a way that creates harmony.

What is means to classical musicians: A way of life that is sometimes difficult, but you couldn't imagine doing anything else.