9 Amazing Places I Have Never Been

I have arguably never been to any of these 9 destinations, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take this tour with me!

1. Chicago

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The Windy City! Chitown!
I hear they dye the river green on St. Patrick’s day, which is something beyond what I would have imagined possible for a city to do.

Willis Tower!

2. Hawaii


The 50th state, and only one that is also an island chain! This known vacation destination was once an independent country, which is a pretty cool fact for a state to have!

Kona Coffee? Stitch!

3. The Moon


Our only natural satellite! Only 12 people have walked on the surface of this bad boy (or girl, personally I always thought the moon was a lady). Pocked with empty seas, our night sun is totally unavailable for travelers and my #1 night time destination.

Temperatures range from highs 253º, with lows -243º. Bring a jacket!

4. Duluth


Minnesota! Take a tour along the coast of Lake Superior, one of 5 great lakes!

To be totally honest I know next to nothing about Duluth, but based on the wikipedia photos there is hella nature and major quaintness to this former home to the worst fire to spread in this Minnesota hotspot!

Bring a jacket!

5. The Sun


Hot Stuff! Plasma! No Way Back!

This Star is located at the direct center of our solar system, and is the source of all life on our meager planet.

Better book your tickets, because this source of light will only be around another 4.5 billion years.

Again, No Way Back Alive!

6. The Belly of a Whale!


Devoid of Light! Fish Smells! Biblical Prophets! Wooden Children!

The digestive track of this blue whale is as spacious as a five star hotel suite, but at a fraction of the cost! Just break a few omega red krill oil pills on your body and hop in the gelid waters of the arctic ocean!

Potentially no way out!

7. Paris


The City of Lights! Goddamn Croissants!

I have utterly no interest explaining this one, but I hear people really like it/
Towers! Arches! Gay Marriage!

8. The Marina Trench


Deepest Place on the surface of the earth! Abyssal Animals!

Feel real terror when your whole body is crushed by the pressure of the waters of the ocean!

Visit with the flounders who somehow live here!


9. The Future


Inevitable! The march of time!
It seems like I am just always clawing the fringe of this final local!
Literally impossible to arrive at.

Will become the Past!
Bring a Jacket!

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