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1. Around strangers, you feign the disposition of a stealth badass, even with the checkout clerk at the grocery store.
2. The megalomania is taking over, which means you’ve become unreasonably assertive at the workplace (you’re really working that death stare).
3. You’ve been bitching about the wait. Also, “bitch” has become your preferred expletive when spewing anger at someone…
…when congratulating yourself…
…and a general substitute for verbal exclamations, punctuations, et al
4. The second season of the Newsroom has only exacerbated your withdrawal symptoms.
5. You traded your regular ride for an RV.
6. And you’re planning on spending your next summer camping out (in that RV) in some desert in New Mexico. (You might only cook, ahem toast, marshmallows though.)
7. You have this newfound appreciation for science nerds and have abandoned your old (indie-hipster/liberal arts/bling ring) friends for people with some real expertise.
8. Stubborn stains impress you. You’ve been showing an obsessive interest in corrosive substances (like interrogating your cleaner about what helped remove that fossilized shit stain in the toilet).
But the worst is yet to come. When it's all over in the fall.
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