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How To Nonchalantly Be The First To Donuts In The Break Room

The perfect combination of stealth and decorum.

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SITUATION: You open a group email about donuts in the break room. You're the first to see it. BE COOL. What you do next is very important.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com
Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

1. Casually look around to ensure no one else has seen it yet. Then quietly close the email.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

2. Ever so softly push back in your chair, wheeling out about 3 feet from your desk.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

3. Now stand up and yawn, arms stretched to the sky. Externally you are lackadaisical, internally you are focused on your mission.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

4. As you stretch, gently kick your chair back to create a lane for your escape. Make it look like an accident. (It is not.)

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

5. Keep yawning and stretching as you quietly move away from your desk. "Oh, that guy, he's just stretching his legs," your coworkers will think.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

6. Keep yawning and stretching right past your completely oblivious colleagues.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

7. Continue to inconspicuously amble down the hallway, nothing happening here but a good yawn-and-stretch.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

8. You have won. You are alone in the break room. With your hand on the lid, savor this moment. The donut choice is yours.

Nathan W. Pyle / Via buzzfeed.com

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