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Lizzo Drunkenly DM'ing Chris Evans Is The Content I Needed Today

"Don’t drink and DM, kids."

BEHOLD: Chris Evans, a very attractive man.

Chris posing on a red carpet

I mean, who among us — especially after a lil' beer or five — has not been tempted to DM the man on Instagram to see if maybe, MAYBE, he might see it and therefore fall in love???

Well, it looks like one person who has felt this compulsion is none other than Lizzo.

Lizzo wearing a strapless gown and stole on the Grammys red carpet

In a new TikTok, Lizzo shared her attempts to DM Chris with the caption, "Don’t drink and DM, kids.... for legal porpoises this is a joke."


Don’t drink and DM, kids.... for legal porpoises this is a joke

♬ original sound - HI I’M TATI 💕

In the audio, Lizzo is lip-synching, “The reason I’m upset about this one is because I know I’m not going to be able to marry him, and honestly, it hurts me to the core — because damn, Papa, he a rare breed, no comparing.”

She then shared her DM to Chris, which, honestly, poetry.

For one, there is the fact that Chris and Lizzo don't follow each other.

Then there's the time — we love being drunk at a solid 5:22 p.m.

Of course, then there's the choice of emojis Lizzo went with. I didn't understand them because I am 1,000 years old, but apparently these mean she's "shooting her shot":

Now, if Lizzo's facial expression is anything to go by, it appears that she is a touch embarrassed by the whole thing — to which I say no!!! Do what I cannot, gal!!! You go for that gorgeous man!!!

TL;DR: Plz make Chrizzo a thing.