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    Travis Barker Posted A Video Of Kourtney Kardashian Sucking His Thumb, And Oh Holy Hell

    "YOU’RE A BLESSING TO THIS WORLD."

    Today is Kourtney Kardashian's birthday!

    If you thought her boyfriend Travis Barker — owner of a newly minted "Kourtney Kardashian" tattoo — was about to go above and beyond for his Queen's birthday, you'd be absolutely right. Exhibit A: this floral arrangement he bought her.

    Well, the festivities didn't stop there! Travis also posted a PDA-filled Instagram tribute to Kourtney, writing, "I FUCKING LOVE YOU! YOU’RE A BLESSING TO THIS WORLD. HAPPY BIRTHDAY."

    So there I was, merrily scrolling through the sexy, sexy photos, when I landed on a video that has shaken me. For one, LOOK AT HOW IT STARTS:

    Travis Barker / Via instagram.com

    I thought it was something very different and I KNOW I am not alone in that.

    SHOULD I BE ALLOWED TO WATCH THIS???

    Travis Barker / Via instagram.com

    This is...a lot.

    Travis Barker / Via instagram.com

    For those of you who may say, "Oh but you're just jealous!" I say: Of course!! I have been alone in my apartment for over a year!! I don't think I even know what human contact is anymore!!!!

    Anyway, the comments were all here for it, so maybe I'm just the spongiest of fun sponges ever to sponge.

    Travis Barker / Via instagram.com

    Have fun celebrating Travourtney!!!

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