1. This incredible commitment to a joke:
Great news, everbody! It took several months of intensive research, experimentation, and trial-and-error, but at long last I have (1/2)
2. This excellent pun:
The tenth Fast and Furious movie should be called Fast 10: Your Seatbelts
3. This lesson in screenwriting:
Password must contain capital letter, a number, an emotional arc, a male lead "struggling w/inner demons" & a strong female character.
4. This ominous prediction:
5. This example of perfect curation:
*people perpetuating national stereotypes during floods* is one of my favourite photographic genres. 🇫🇷 🇬🇧 🇮🇹 🇦🇺
6. This pocket-sized oxymoron:
🤔🤔🤔
7. This "the floor is" joke to end all other "the floor is" jokes:
The floor is EU
8. This joke you'll now think of every time it's unbearably hot:
It's so hot a Tennessee Williams play just broke out in my room
9. This perfect pun:
When it skulks on a reef And has two sets of teeth ... That's a moray.
10. And this equally perfect response to it:
@olivernmoody @dontattempt When these circles collide and their lines coincide That's a moiré
11. These rewritten lyrics:
It's the remix to ignition Hot and fresh out the kitchen 4,000 homes for rough sleepers And you won't have to pay f… https://t.co/6gNfp8Lphx
12. This foiled plan:
At the very least, you've got to use a smaller font, guys.
13. This graph, which technically is not wrong at all:
One of the fifth-graders I work with made this in his science class. It wasn't even for a grade.
14. This interesting backstory:
Another juggler gives up on his dreams...
15. This helpful tip on how to get to your goal weight, if your goal weight is in the negative numbers:
beware diet advice that recommends "eating light," for that is most certainly the way you become a black hole
16. This perfect irony:
This twitter UI update is great
17. This double-whammy of dog puns:
Purebread dogs vs. inbread dogs
18. This perceptive wife and/or predictable husband:
WIFE: This is for a tweet isn't it...
19. This sly threat:
this is so great, i love my school