21 Carefree And Bohemian Things To Do Even If You're Not At A Festival
Find a vat of glitter and just swim in it. The glitter will remain in your crevices for years to come, but so will the memories.
1. Move to a barren and desolate desert. If anyone wants to host a festival there, you’ll be ready and waiting.
2. Find a pack of wild coyotes and befriend them. They are your family now. Run free amongst them.
3. Eat 4,325 types of mushrooms. Statistically, at least one of them must be magic.
4. Grow your hair long and braid it. All of your hair. Braid your armpit hair.
5. Find a vat of glitter and just swim in it. The glitter will remain in your crevices for years to come, but so will the memories.
6. Consult a weeping willow for practical life advice.
7. Wear only loose and flowing fabrics. Sure, you might get caught in an escalator or two, and often chiffon is incredibly flammable, but it’s a small price to pay for looking like a floating woodland princess.
8. Run through fields of grass. It doesn’t matter where the field is or what you’re doing, or how many farmers will be displeased, never leave a field untrampled.
9. Turn all your trousers into cut-offs. If anyone doesn’t understand why your woollen suit trousers are now shorts, then they don’t get fashion.
10. Buy a £250 dress and then burn it. Nothing more carefree than not valuing material things.
11. Break into a florist at night and spend the entire night turning the flower bouquets into flower crowns.
12. Better yet, just take them from your neighbour’s garden. It’s not stealing because the flowers belong to the earth.
13. Only wear second hand clothing. Just take clothes from the washing lines of your neighbours. It's also not stealing because cloth fibres come from plants, which belong to the earth.
14. Instead of getting a bongo drum, get an actual bongo, the large African antelope. Befriend it and cherish it. It is your son now.
15. Instead of getting a feather crown, consider crowning a feather instead, and perhaps starting an avian-based religion.
16. Just roll around in some mud.
17. Let the mud you roll around in dry like a mud mask. It might have a a few worms and twigs in it, but they all have good detoxifying effects.
18. Deck your entire body in rose quartz. It’ll repel bad energy and the weight of carrying it will tone you, too.
19. Pee in the forest next to your friend, just for the invaluable bonding experience.
20. Go skinny-dipping in a lake. The other visitors to the park might not appreciate it, but it’s the price society must pay for true freedom of expression.
21. Take a very long and leisurely time to do a poo in your own toilet, flush it, and admire the beauty of indoor plumbing and the serenity of not having a huge queue of people waiting just outside.