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Sorry But Lorelai Gilmore Is Kind Of The Worst

NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT YOU, LORELAI.

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First of all, what justification does she have to hate her parents with the zeal of a teenager overcome with hormones?

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They never abused her, they never neglected her. They ARE controlling but they clearly still love her despite everything and do everything to try to be more involved in her life. UR LIFE IS NOT THAT BAD, LORELAI.

OK, yeah, her parents are hyper-critical.

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But no one else is ever going to be as honest, and therefore as critical, as your parents because no one else is going to bother investing that much emotional energy into changing you.

Like, obviously, Emily and Richard aren't angels but they're clearly always coming from a place of love, like the time they decided to buy Lorelai and Luke a new marital home.

Lorelai has so little concern for her mother's feelings that she openly insults and humiliates her in a national publication.

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Yes, she regrets it later, but what sort of person starts comparing their mother to Hitler in front of a journalist in the first place?

In fact, as a mother herself, and a dang adult, why is Lorelai completely unable to empathise with her own mother?

Emily Gilmore is not on a par with Hitler. In fact, one could even go so far as to say that very few peoples' mothers are on a par with Hitler.

AND HERE'S THE KICKER, GUYS: It is stubbornness and self-righteousness, not heroism and determination, that lead her to start her own, new life in Stars Hollow!

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It's super admirable that everything Rory and Lorelai own now is due to Lorelai's own efforts.

BUT, what forced Lorelai to bring her newborn baby to live in a shed, in a stranger's hotel? Only her own need to establish herself as independent forced her to do this: in short, her pride. Her mother did not know about the conditions her daughter and granddaughter lived in until years later (in Season 2, when she finds out from Mia, the owner of the Independence Inn where Lorelei sought refuge like some sort of biblical character). So, basically, Lorelai didn't even try to first reason or compromise with her parents to find some middle ground where she didn't have to risk the health of her newborn but also didn't have to abide by her parents' expectations.

Instead, Lorelai stubbornly put herself and her newborn daughter in danger and through hell just out of sheer unwillingness to compromise with her parents.

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"Hey Mum, why do we have to live in a shed?" – baby Rory, probably.

"Because my parents made me go to a fancy school and didn't let me go to rock concerts." – Lorelai.

Then, years later, she comes to her parents asking for money for her daughter's tuition (as a last resort).

Instead of turning her away and disowning her, like many GENUINELY awful parents would do, or even charging her interest on a loan, like many other WASP-y parents would do, all her parents ask for is to spend time with her and their only grandchild, once a week.

Lorelai's response to her parents paying Rory's tuition (and also, in essence, paying for their own offspring to spend time with them) is to try TO avoid them as much as possible.

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EVERY DANG FRIDAY NIGHT DINNER, Lorelai makes it super clear that her parents suck sooo much for making her eat avocado and grill her about her love life, which really is just standard parent behaviour, tbh. Not everyone can be a cool mum like you, Lorelai.

This puts Rory in the position of being the constant mediator between her mum and her grandparents, both of whom she loves.

Honestly, what did her parents do that was just so bad???

Like, how would you feel if the only way you could convince your daughter to spend time with you, and to let your only grandchild to spend time with you, was by using your money as leverage? And even then, you have to put up with never-ending repulsion and eye-rolling from her???? IS THERE SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT TELLING US ABOUT LORELAI'S UPBRINGING, AMY SHERMAN-PALLADINO?

Rory and her grandparents just genuinely all want to have a normal, loving relationship.

But Lorelai is constantly putting Rory in a position where she has to choose between her and her grandparents, which is not a ~cool mum~ thing to do.

In fact, Lorelai treats just about everyone in her life like utter shite.

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"Hey Sooki, I know you just gave birth, but how about you do some labour-intensive work with me to start up a catering business instead of resting?"

"Hey Max, I don't love you any more so instead of having an adult discussion and a clean breakup I am literally going to run away just before our wedding."

"Hey Luke, I am just going to go ahead and steal all your food from your cafe that you rely on for your livelihood."

But you know what is even worse? Everyone in Stars Hollow is a damn enabler of this awful behaviour.

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Maybe the requirement for being able to live in Stars Hollow is to be willing to drop everything in your own life because the Gilmore girls want you to clean the gutters for them?

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