Yes, OK, we all know that Lorelai Gilmore isn't a regular mum, she's a cool mum.
Yet, despite her loveable kookiness, she is deeply flawed. Deeply.
First of all, what justification does she have to hate her parents with the zeal of a teenager overcome with hormones?
OK, yeah, her parents are hyper-critical.
Lorelai has so little concern for her mother's feelings that she openly insults and humiliates her in a national publication.
In fact, as a mother herself, and a dang adult, why is Lorelai completely unable to empathise with her own mother?
Emily Gilmore is not on a par with Hitler. In fact, one could even go so far as to say that very few peoples' mothers are on a par with Hitler.
AND HERE'S THE KICKER, GUYS: It is stubbornness and self-righteousness, not heroism and determination, that lead her to start her own, new life in Stars Hollow!
Instead, Lorelai stubbornly put herself and her newborn daughter in danger and through hell just out of sheer unwillingness to compromise with her parents.
Then, years later, she comes to her parents asking for money for her daughter's tuition (as a last resort).
Instead of turning her away and disowning her, like many GENUINELY awful parents would do, or even charging her interest on a loan, like many other WASP-y parents would do, all her parents ask for is to spend time with her and their only grandchild, once a week.
Lorelai's response to her parents paying Rory's tuition (and also, in essence, paying for their own offspring to spend time with them) is to try TO avoid them as much as possible.
Honestly, what did her parents do that was just so bad???
Like, how would you feel if the only way you could convince your daughter to spend time with you, and to let your only grandchild to spend time with you, was by using your money as leverage? And even then, you have to put up with never-ending repulsion and eye-rolling from her???? IS THERE SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT TELLING US ABOUT LORELAI'S UPBRINGING, AMY SHERMAN-PALLADINO?
Rory and her grandparents just genuinely all want to have a normal, loving relationship.
But Lorelai is constantly putting Rory in a position where she has to choose between her and her grandparents, which is not a ~cool mum~ thing to do.