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    18 Things Only Composers Will Understand

    You nervously sidle up to the door. The bouncer looks at you. "Password?" You look left, you look right, and lean in to whisper: "Hemidemisemiquaver" He nods and opens the door.

    1. You own at least 7 VST plug-ins that you've never used

    2. You get briefs like this: "We want it to sound like ukulele dubstep folkcore metal, but no guitars, absolutely no guitars. But absolutely must have a glockenspiel….and a washboard."

    3. You are obsessed with buying new instruments, and will buy any new percussion instrument at the drop of a hat.

    4. When you are 'in the zone' you lose track of time, forget to eat, forget to leave the house…

    5. You have a masters or degree in music, but some of the people you work for will act like they know more about it than you.

    6. When your music is broadcast on TV for the first time, it's the best feeling, ever.

    7. You have VERY broad music tastes

    8. You often work on your own, and talk to your cat for company

    9. Even though you love lots of different kinds of music and have studied them all extensively, no music agency will have you on their books for more than one genre

    10. You often have the music you've been writing going round your head before you go to sleep

    11. When pitching music for TV adverts the brief will change a minimum of 17.4 times

    12. You can never decide what to include on your showreel

    13. You write music in your head

    14. When you get to work with real musicians instead of your computer, it's awesome

    15. Only 13% of composers are women. Nobody knows why.

    16. You work or try to get work with people so elusive and impossible to contact you're sometimes not actually sure they exist.

    17. You wish you had a marimba

    18. You often think about quitting and getting a 'real' job, but know you never will.