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Things That Only Make Sense To People Who Hate Talking On The Phone

Why can't you just text me?

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Which they don't, because they're jerks, so now the phone has been ringing for an impossibly long time — longer than a normal phone would ring, certainly — and it is really stressing you out.

Then suddenly you remember that they'll probably want you to call back, which is another jerk move, so you scramble to think of which scenario is better: picking up now or calling back later.

Both of which are dreadful, but you decide you'd rather call back later because that means you don't have to talk on the phone right now, which is really wonderful. And maybe you'll be ready to talk later. I mean, who knows?

All of which is avoidable, if you'd just pick up the phone and talk. But that's not something you're interested in doing. And you know what? That's OK. People need to learn to stop calling you. Unless, of course, it's an emergency.

Even then, though, they should still probably send a text. Otherwise, how would you know it's an emergency?

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