1. You better watch out.
2. You better not cry.
3. And no, before you ask, the Mensch on the Bench does not want to build your motherf*cking snow man.
4. All the donuts are belong to him.
5. He's been known to photobomb the odd celebrity selfie.
6. He ruled the Ice Bucket Challenge.
7. He enjoys the basic things in life.
8. He paid $400 for a no-touching meet and greet with Avril.
9. There's nothing he loves more than a good bowl of ball.
10. Rainbow Dash is his chiropractor.
11. He's a fierce competitor.
12. ...Especially at dreidel.
13. He's been known to get himself into a pickle.
14. ...or two...
15. He really really really wants some bacon.
16. He found your liquor cabinet.
17. But he's happy to share.
18. He poops gelt.
19. He's been to the land before time.
20. He wishes the Elf no ill will.
21. Unless she reaches for his cookies.
Want a Mensch of your very own? Visit his official website!