1. “Guys! Guys! What if we made pretend UGGs, but platform, like Baby Spice? Girls love Baby Spice.”
Hockey rinks aren’t that cold, guys.
Who had to go hunt a bear and staple it to one of the Spice Girls’ discarded platform boots to make these? Whose job is that? Can that be my job?
2. “You know what we need in the NHL? More … babies. That look like each other. And their moms. Because genetics, and clothing.”
Here’s a fun fact: did you know that thing in the middle was called a “creeper”? The NHL sure did when they advertised a “maternity infant set … [including] a creeper and a bib.”
There’s only one creeper in this bar, NHL, and it’s that guy that keeps buying you drinks because you have “eyes like the summer moon at its zenith.”
- Sixteen people died after a hot air balloon caught fire and crashed in Texas Saturday.