9 Big Romantic Gestures From Rom-Coms That Would Probably Work In Real Life, And 7 That Would Be Huge Red Flags

Love is in the air, and so are my hands every time I see that damn Ferris wheel scene from The Notebook.

Valentine's Day is this month, so it's officially rom-com season. Which means we're about to see countless meet-cutes, maybe some enemies-to-lovers relationships, and A LOT of big romantic gestures.

Warner Bros. Television Distribution / Via giphy.com

Usually, a character performs a big romantic gesture either to apologize for something they did in order to win their partner back or they're trying to woo them in the first place.

20th Television / Via giphy.com

A lot of the time, they're actually pretty romantic and sweet. But sometimes — especially in older films — they're not. They're either super cringey and embarrassing for everyone involved, go waaay too far, or they're just the bare minimum.

So here are nine big romantic gestures from movies that are actually impressive, and seven that are extremely UNimpressive:

1. IMPRESSIVE — The Princess Diaries (2001)

Buena Vista Pictures Distribution

Mia (Anne Hathaway) blows off Michael (Robert Schwartzman) to hang out with another guy. He doesn't really accept her regular apology or an invite to the Genovian Independence Day Ball. So Mia sends him a pizza with an M&M apology on top. And we know how much Michael loves M&M's. He has them jumping around the keys while he's playing the piano. And honestly, Mia's going through a lot right now, so the fact that she even found the time to do this is pretty impressive.

You can watch the scene here:

Buena Vista Pictures Distribution / Via youtube.com

2. IMPRESSIVE — The Wedding Singer (1998)

New Line Cinema

Robbie (Adam Sandler) just found out that the love of his life, Julia (Drew Barrymore), is on her way to Vegas to get married to her asshole fiancé. So what does he do? He buys a first-class ticket to Vegas, finds out he happens to be on the same flight as them, recruits Billy Idol to help, and performs a love song he wrote for her. This might be the best big romantic gesture on this list, tbh. I say this EVEN THOUGH I prefer his other song "Somebody Kill Me," but I get why he couldn't use it to confess his love to Julia.

You can watch the scene here:

New Line Cinema / Via youtube.com

3. IMPRESSIVE — Brown Sugar (2002)

Fox Searchlight Pictures

Even though they're both in relationships with other people, Dre (Taye Diggs) and Sid (Sanaa Lathan), BFFS since they were kids, belong together. When they both finally realize this, Dre calls up the radio show where Sid's promoting her new book. A few minutes later, he shows up at the radio station, declares his love for Sid, says the iconic "you're my air," and then holds up a note reading "will you go out with me?" — both a callback from an earlier convo between the two and a reminder of when they first met as kids. Swoon!

You can watch the scene here:

Fox Searchlight Pictures / Via youtube.com

4. UNIMPRESSIVE — The Duff (2015)

Lionsgate

Wesley (Robbie Amell) is kind of an asshole to Bianca (Mae Whitman) this entire movie (and seemingly since they were kids) — I mean, he's the one who tells her she's a DUFF in the first place. But he really kicks it up a notch when he takes his on-again-off-again girlfriend, Madison (Bella Thorne), to Bianca's secret spot where the two of them shared a kiss earlier in the movie.

In the end, when he's announced homecoming king and expected to accept the crown next to Madison, who obviously won queen, he turns around and "gets the girl" (meaning Bianca) instead. I get that he's making a ~statement~ by publicly refusing the title and Madison, and choosing Bianca, but it's too little, too late. Nothing he does, honestly, could make up for how he treated her.

You can watch the scene here:

Lionsgate / Via youtube.com

5. IMPRESSIVE — But I'm a Cheerleader (1999)

Lionsgate Films

Megan (Natasha Lyonne) and Graham (Clea DuVall) form a relationship at a gay conversion camp. After the higher-ups find out the two had sex, Megan gets kicked out, while Graham stays, pressured by her family.

To win her back, Megan slo-mo walks into the camp's "graduation" wearing her cheerleading uniform. She performs the cutest little cheer and declares her love for Graham. And, of course, Graham accepts and escapes graduation to be with Megan. And yes, I cry every time.

You can watch the scene here:

Lionsgate Films / Via youtube.com

6. UNIMPRESSIVE — 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Disney

There are actually a few big romantic gestures in this movie. But let's talk about when Patrick (Heath Ledger) performs "Can't Take My Eyes Off You" for Kat (Julia Stiles) on the school bleachers while she's at soccer practice. Listen, in theory, this works. But when I tell you how nervous this made me when I was a kid, I'm being incredibly serious. The thought of his character putting someone on the spot like this almost — and I say almost because it absolutely didn't — made me doubt my love for Heath Ledger.

(There are going to be other gestures on this list that I like that put people on the spot, but IDK what to tell you. You'll just have to deal with the hypocrisy, okay?)

You can watch the scene here:

Disney / Via youtube.com

7. IMPRESSIVE — 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Disney

THE best character, Michael (David Krumholtz), anonymously asks Kat's Shakespeare-obsessed BFF, Mandella (Susan May Pratt), to prom by leaving her a Medieval Times–looking dress in her locker. Did he assume her size? Yes. Did he maybe take away the typical teen girl prom dress shopping tradition that all these movies say is important? Possibly, BUT Mandella's not a typical girl, okay?!

Michael, dressed kind of more like Austin Powers than Elizabethan, meets her at prom, and the whole thing is really cute! We love a good side character happy ending storyline!

8. UNIMPRESSIVE — 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Disney

Okay, sorry to keep harping on this movie. This is the last one, I promise. This one's a doozy because it's AWARE that it's bad. Basically, Patrick buys Kat a Fender to try and make up for the fact that he was paid to take Kat out by the "one person [she] truly hates." She accepts the guitar and apology, but her saying, "You can't just buy me a guitar every time you mess up" is reading, at least to me, like, "This is a shitty apology. Don't do this again."

You can watch the scene here:

Disney / Via youtube.com

9. UNIMPRESSIVE — Never Been Kissed (1999)

20th Century Fox

I know I've already mentioned my absolute disdain for putting people on the spot, but this one takes the cake. After Josie (Drew Barrymore) pretends to be a high school student for an article, inadvertently forms ~a sort~ of relationship with her teacher, Mr. Coulson (Michael Vartan), who she's supposed to write the article about, and blows her cover, she needs to apologize to him.

She writes an article in the Chicago Sun-Times asking Mr. Coulson to meet her on the pitcher's mound at a packed baseball game for her first kiss. He's put on the spot practically in front of the whole city. It's incredibly nerve-wracking for everyone involved. BUT, I have to say, I love this movie so much, and I still tear up as soon as I hear "Don't Worry Baby" playing, so like, maybe ignore everything I just said.

You can watch the scene here:

20th Century Fox / Via youtube.com

10. UNIMPRESSIVE — Just Wright (2010)

Fox Searchlight Pictures

Scott (Common) fucks up pretty bad in this movie. The night after he has sex with Leslie (Queen Latifah), he reconciles with his former fiancé, leaving Leslie in the dust. Once he realizes he actually loves Leslie, though, he travels from New Jersey to Philadelphia to try and win her back. But what does his plan consist of? Nothing. I mean, he apologizes and says some nice things. But it doesn't really make up for what he did. I'm gonna need a little more than him standing outside a building leaning against a car. Flowers maybe?

You can watch the scene here:

Fox Searchlight Pictures / Via youtube.com

11. IMPRESSIVE — Just Like Heaven (2005)

DreamWorks Pictures

I'm not even gonna try to explain the situation surrounding this gesture, because there are coma ghosts involved and it's too much. But basically, Elizabeth (Reese Witherspoon) wants a rooftop garden, and even after she rejects David (Mark Ruffalo), he gives it to her. This gesture's even more impressive because he didn't expect anything out of it. He just wanted her to have her garden — and that's hot.

Yes, he sneaks into her apartment to do this, but I guess it's not entirely creepy, right? Listen to me trying to justify a B&E. Maybe this is in the wrong category.

You can watch the scene here:

DreamWorks Pictures / Via youtube.com

12. UNIMPRESSIVE — The Notebook (2004)

New Line Cinema

Noah (Ryan Gosling) literally hangs off of a Ferris wheel in order to get Allie (Rachel McAdams), a person he does not know, to go out with him. The absolute chokehold this scene had on people in 2004 was wild. Now, though, threatening to fall to your (probable) death to force someone to go out with you is not the look.

You can watch the scene here:

New Line Cinema / Via youtube.com

13. IMPRESSIVE — Uptown Girls (2003)

MGM Distribution Co.

After Molly (Brittany Murphy) is forced to sell her dead father's guitar collection because she has no money, it ends up going to an anonymous buyer. Turns out, Neal (Jesse Spencer), her love interest, was the anonymous buyer. And his way of apologizing for being such a dick to her throughout the movie is to sing a song her father wrote for her and present her with the guitar collection.

Since we don't exactly know if Molly and Neal end up together, and that's not really the point, I guess this is less "romantic" and more "oh my god, I'm going to throw up from crying so hard."

You can watch the scene here:

MGM Distribution Co. / Via youtube.com

14. UNIMPRESSIVE — Love Actually (2003)

Universal Pictures

This is just gonna be a list:

Sam (Thomas Brodie-Sangster) rushing through a busy airport to confess his love to Joanna (Olivia Olson) who's leaving the country anyway. And have they even spoken to each other before?

Jamie (Colin Firth) traveling to Portugal to ask Aurélia (Lúcia Moniz) to marry him when they've never even had a conversation with each other because they don't speak the same language.

Mark (Andrew Lincoln) showing up at Juliet (Keira Knightley)'s house holding cue cards revealing his love for her while his best friend (and Juliet's new husband) sits inside. It's a no from me.

15. IMPRESSIVE — Marry Me (2022)

Universal Pictures

This movie helped usher in a rom-com renaissance, and it's no wonder, because it's got a very endearing "big romantic gesture" at the end. Kat (Jennifer Lopez), a famous popstar, needs to win back Charlie (Owen Wilson), a man she married because he was holding a sign at one of her concerts that read "marry me" (which didn't even belong to him). So she rushes to make it in time to his daughter's math-a-thon and holds the same "marry me" sign. If this is the future of rom-coms, sign me up!

You can watch the scene here:

Universal Pictures / Via youtube.com

16. And finally, IMPRESSIVE — 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Disney

Hey, remember when I said I was done talking about this movie? WELL, I lied because I forgot about this scene. Before Kat even finds out about the whole "being paid to take her out" thing, Patrick has her favorite band come out on stage during prom and perform. And you might be saying, "Uhhh Molly, he totally puts her on the spot...again." But honestly, not really. Kay Hanley quickly walks over to them and walks back to the stage. It's literally a nanosecond, so Kat's not really put on the spot. AND if someone got Letters to Cleo to perform for me, I would die.

You can watch the scene here:

Disney / Via youtube.com

What are some other big romantic gestures from movies that you like/dislike? Sound off in the comments!