10 Essential Vacation Tips From My Mom, Illustrated By Pictures Of Puppies.

It's okay if your mom didn't teach you these things, she probably has a lot of great qualities and I'm sure you love her for a really good reason. Luckily, though, we all have my mom to teach us how to vacation right.

1. Don't Leave Your House a Mess.

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Do you know what smells worse than a bunch of dirty dishes from last night's dinner? A bunch of dishes from two weeks ago's dinner. Unless you like coming home to three generations of a fruit fly family and a concerned note from a neighbor who thinks you might have died in your apartment, you should clean up before you leave. Plus, it makes coming home a whole lot nicer.

2. Don't Pack Dirty Clothes

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If those blue jeans you wore two days ago really make your butt look THAT good, you'll take the time to wash them before you shove them in your duffel bag. If you don't do that, all your clothes will smell like the hot sauce you spilled on your jeans because while you CAN rub that stain you can't make the smell go away.

3. If you're staying with people, bring them something.

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A hotel costs a lot more than a fake poinsettia or a bottle of wine. Your friends are cool for letting you stay with them, show them.

4. Keep Your Stuff In One Corner

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Nothing says "I don't appreciate your hospitality," like spreading your stuff around another person's home. Also, if you're in a hotel, not having one, single place that you put your stuff makes forgetting things a lot easier. You like that teal v-neck, and if you put it with all your other shit, you won't leave it under the arm chair at the La Quinta.

5. Fold Your Blankets

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Jessica was super nice to let you sleep on her sofa and to let you use her Grandma's quilt while you did it. She's going to have to fold that quilt to put it away, so be the shining star I know you are and fold it for her.

6. Hang Up Your Towels

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"I LOVE THE WAY MOLDY TOWELS SMELL, I'M SO GLAD MY FRIEND LEFT THIS TOWEL IN A HEAP NEXT TO THE SOFA SO THAT THIS TOWEL WILL SMELL LIKE A CAR WITH A LEAKY SUNROOF EVEN AFTER I WASH IT TWICE." - Your nice friends, never.

7. You're On Vacation, Be Excited that It Isn't Just Like Home

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The food might be different, things will smell different, you might not be able to find that one kind of bottled water you always drink. Well, all the people who DO live here all the time have managed to survive, so just relax. I'm sure Ozark Springs Water tastes just as good as Zephyr Hills Water and even if it doesn't, sometimes life is hard and your problems are real. Be the supple sapling, weather the storm.

8. Pack Too Many Pairs of Underwear

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Too many pairs are the perfect number of pairs. Trust me.

9. Relax

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No matter how uptight you normally are, try to relinquish control while you're on a trip. Everyone will thank you. Literally everyone.

10. Get Out of The Car Sometimes

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It could be at a rest stop, a scenic overlook, or an adult novelty store that's been having a "going out of business" sale for the last 15 years: you'll learn a lot about yourself (and the world!) just by getting out of the car and exploring a little.