1. You turn on your computer and connect to the internet.
4. Just kidding your mom just picked up the phone.
5. You try again…
6. You’re in.
7. The first thing you do is sign onto AIM.
11. Oh well, I guess this means you can burn that CD you’ve been meaning to make.
15. NO RESULTS.
You can’t do your homework now. Great.
17. DAMMIT MOM.
18. WHY CAN’T WE GET A SECOND LINE?
21. OK, so you want to look at some porn.
22. BUT THE INTERNET IS SO SLOW THAT THE PICTURE WON’T LOAD.
23. Fuck that. I guess you’ll have to settle for some Oregon Trail.
25. And then Nicole gets dysentery.
That was fun.
29. You find what you want. It’s going to take an hour for this one song.
30. 2.5 hours later…
31. It finished!
32. JK IT’S A VIRUS
35. You want to die.
37. So you just sit there, stare, and hope that the computer will magically work if it “rests” for a while.
- At least 29 people are dead and 166 hurt after explosions outside a stadium in Turkey, the country's interior minister said.
- Trump will reportedly pick ExxonMobil's CEO Rex Tillerson as secretary of state. He has a long history of oil deals with Russia.
- Gen. David Petraeus helped block the autopsy of an Afghan man who died mysteriously in US custody, emails show.
- People are in love with a dog who rides around in a decked out dog car spreading Christmas cheer to hospital patients 🐶🎄