Lady Gaga's highly anticipated future #1 album Chromatica arrives tomorrow.
"Stupid Love" WAS the moment.
"Rain on Me" IS the moment.
Homosexuality is thriving.
For those of the non-straight, "Chromatica" is a place. It's a vibe. It's a feeling. Here's how Gaga explained it:
I live on Chromatica, that is where I live. I went into my frame — I found Earth, I deleted it. Earth is canceled. I live on Chromatica.
You hear that? Earth is canceled.
On Twitter, an account called @ChromaticaGov is functioning as the makeshift head of state for Chromatica.
In Gaga We Trust
They have decided that the Cock Destroyers are head of TSA.
Cock Destroyers, @more_milf @SophieASlut are Head of TSA at Chromatican International Airport. They have a zero tolerance policy for any paraphernalia entering our borders. All visitors are subject to search upon entry!
Iced coffee is the beverage of choice.
Iced coffee is sold by the gallon on Chromatica.
Slow walking is banned.
Speed walking is mandatory
There are free poppers.
Poppers are free on Chromatica
Heterosexuality is tolerated, but not encouraged.
Heterosexuality is Legal on Chromatica, but not ideal.
And bottoms get a monthly stimulus.
Bottoms are not required to work and get a monthly paycheck from the Chromatican Government
It's ideal.
Yesterday, Gaga tweeted that she would personally be delivering copies of Chromatica to stores.
Delivering #Chromatica myself to every retailer around the world… in Chromatica time and distance do not exist 🤪 https://t.co/4Kko04hk4v
She included this newly iconic picture of her driving a truck in a face mask.
Because this is what fans do nowadays, the Chromatica Government account tweeted at FedEx that "this woman" almost hit them with a truck.
.@FedEx @FedExHelp this woman almost hit me while driving down my block delivering packages for you. I wrote her plates down just in time.. it read “PSSYWGN” please do something immediately
And FedEx seemingly believed them, because they earnestly replied. 😩
Someone else in the replies echoed the same sentiment, adding that the *same woman* called them the "f word."
And FedEx replied again.
So, there you have it. Lady Gaga is now a problematic FedEx driver. Go figure. Take me to Chromatica!
