1. Because they know to make a good weed joke...
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2. And they're always there for their customers.
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3. Because they want to fulfill all your needs...
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4. And they always live every week like it's Shark Week.
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5. Because they have products you need to succeed in life...
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6. And they'll do anything to help your performance.
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7. Because they have donuts...
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8. And informative signs.
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9. Because they put the eato in taquito...
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10. And this chill-ass dog is a loyal customer.
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11. Because "someness" is always guaranteed.
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12. Because pet monkeys are always welcome...
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13. And so are pet squirrels.
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14. And don't forget their excellent DVD selection!
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15. But most importantly, once a year they bless the world with "Bring Your Own Cup Day."
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16. And it is the most treasured day on the Roman calendar.
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17. It's a day of joy...
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18. ...resourcefulness...
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19. ...creativity...
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20. ...and excess.
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21. Because 7-Eleven is the people's champ.
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