Skip To Content
  • lol badge
  • Olympics badge

16 Reasons To Root Against The Evil Canadians At The Winter Olympics

With the Sochi games a mere 99 days away, it’s time to jump-start your crippling case of SOCHI FEVER by directing all of your hate toward our neighbors to the north.

It's almost that time again when our typically polite, courteous, and unnecessarily apologetic neighbors to the north stop being nice and start getting cocky. We are now officially within 100 days of the Sochi Winter Olympics, which means those damn Canucks are getting ready to dominate the medal stand.

Jeff Vinnick / Getty

During the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, the Canadians finished third in the overall medal count but took home the most golds. So let's look past their generally agreeable nature and find — or invent — some reasons to hate them, because competition is more fun when you're rooting for someone to fail.

1. They act like Molson invented beer. Molson sucks.

2. They flaunt their arrogance everywhere.

3. They act like they never get cold — they're lying.

4. In America we sell beer to people in face paint first! They don't serve them at all.

5. This is the devil's work.

6. Netflix knows what I'm talking about.

7. Sidney Crosby's face just screams "punch me."

8. Their sign sarcasm is mean and tasteless.

9. The friggin' metric system.

10. They're so self-centered.

View this video on YouTube

11. Chad Kroger, lead singer of Nickleback.

Carlo Allegri / Getty

12. Their curling team is smug.

Dean Mouhtaropoulos / Getty
Cameron Spencer / Getty

13. They throw shade at Breaking Bad's premise. AKA fighting words.

14. Those assholes are hogging all the polar bears.

15. They call hooded sweatshirts "bunnyhugs" in Saskatchewan.

Flickr: caseyplusthree

Um, fuck that noise.

16. And they are responsible for this guy.

Canadians seem all friendly. But people who act THAT friendly are probably just covering up their inner perversion. Go USA.