24 Stages Of Getting Shitfaced During The Week

    Responsibilities are awful.

    1. You're about to leave work, go home, make a sensible dinner, and go to sleep early when a friend tells you people are getting drinks...

    2. You're a hard worker so you show up a tad late, but you feel it's your responsibility to take advantage of those sweet-ass savings...

    3. And soon enough you're lulled into the mid-week trap known as happy hour.

    4. After each beer, mixed drink, or glass of wine you tell yourself it's time to go home because you need food and you don't want to be hungover.

    5. But you get lost in the sauce.

    6. You try to pull yourself together...

    7. But it's no use because happy hour has already claimed another victim.

    8. So you set your alarms dreading the disaster that awaits you in the morning.

    9. And you wake up in shambles...

    10. But it's before your alarms so you get some water and you go back to sleep.

    11. Then the first alarm goes off...

    12. And the second...

    13. And the third brings tears to your eyes.

    14. So you lie in bed questioning every decision you've ever made.

    15. Getting out of bed suddenly takes Herculean effort...

    16. But you manage to crawl out of the covers...

    17. And immediately pause for more self-reflection.

    18. You get to work and immediately try to play it Barry Burbank-level cool...

    19. But you're not fooling anyone.

    20. Every minute feels like a decade, and every hour feels like a lifetime.

    21. Even inanimate objects are trolling you.

    22. You're starting to feel better, but you're counting the seconds until you can go home.

    23. You close your computer, pack your bag, and start walking towards the door when...

    24. Someone asks the question...