Parents
19 Things You’ll Never Admit To Teaching Your Kids
“Gee, Principal Stevens, I have absolutely no idea where she learned that.”
1. To look at strangers with an incredibly serious expression and whisper, “I see dead people.”
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3. To pass gas while doing a karate kick and singing, “Everybody was kung-fu farting!”
AndreyKaderov / Via thinkstockphotos.com
4. To reply “a ladies’ man” when someone asks them what they’re going to be when they grow up.
5. Or to answer the same question with a Monty Python-esque, “I want to be a lumberjack!”
Flickr: ritcheyer / Via Creative Commons
7. To shake their head and say, “I am not amused.”
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9. To say, “Boy, these pretzels are making me thirsty.”
#SeinfeldForever
10. To bend their index finger and say “REDRUM! REDRUM! REEEEDDDDD RRRUUUUMMMMM!”
Warner Bros.
15. To reply, “Joey doesn’t share food” whenever anyone asks them for a bite of their food.
Flickr: josephers / Via Creative Commons
19. To welcome new people by saying, “Greetings, human… if indeed you are human.”
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H/T to The Straight Dope.
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