A good tweet is a good tweet, but the BEST tweets are the ones that make you laugh because of how damn relatable they are.
So, my friends, here are a bunch of tweets that are really, really good at making you laugh and feel seen:
1.
coworker relationships are crazy because we don’t hangout or talk outside of work, but i know you tried to poison your husband once
2.
sorry I didn’t text u back I was pretending I didn’t see it and I ended up actually forgetting
3.
computer: "save this image as 6606499f1e5c84d7c30.png?" me: "yea”
4.
2:00pm: Gonna save the other half of this sandwich for later 2:06pm: Time to finish that sandwich
5.
Yesterday I explained something so bleak to my therapist she asked me if we could pause for a minute so she could think about it. I’m getting close to winning therapy I can feel it in my bones.
6.
*Movie's 10 second sex scene begins My dad who's been missing for 12 years: hey whatcha watchin'
8.
Y’all ever try to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so bystanders don’t hear you fighting for your life
9.
Receptionist at the dentist office will look u dead in the eye and ask if ur available 4 months and 13 days from now
10.
millennials are so SPOILED and ENTITLED millennials: is it rude if i ask my employer to pay me
11.
just picked up a rubber band that had been in the same spot on my bedroom floor for a month. absolutely incredible to see what i’m capable of when i give it my all
13.
For my second date with my husband we met in NYC and went to a party and ended up at a McDonald's at 3:00 AM where he reached across the table, grabbed my hands, looked at me adoringly, and said "I hate this. I wanted to go to bed at 9:00. Do not expect this of me again."
14.
U can taste the spoon more than the ice cream https://t.co/VY5AWDhvHK
15.
I fucking hate grocery store check out screens asking me if I want to donate $20 to end child hunger or whatever. You’re a $10 billion corporation. I’m using a coupon to get 50 cents off a bag of potatos. Why don’t YOU donate $20 to end child hunger
16.
actually the class system in america is: - never been to disney - went to disney once or twice - goes to disney annually
17.
I've been alive 20 years and still haven't found the right thing to say when somebody knocks on the door of the public bathroom you're in
18.
“Business school” sounds so made up. It’s what a kindergartner would say if you asked them where dads go all day
20.
we need a 3 day weekend: 1 for errands 1 for social activities 1 for staying in bed like we’ve got some Victorian wasting disease
22.
The airport is a lawless place. 7am? Drink a beer. Tired? Sleep on the floor. Hungry? Chips now cost $17
23.
As a tall person I cannot offer to reach something on a high shelf for a stranger, yet if they ask me I must oblige. This is the law of the giants
25.
damn some bitch just fell down the stairs in my complex and i went to check on her n all she said was “no i deserve this”
26.
I would do absolutely anything to get 8 hours of sleep, except for going to bed 8 hours before I need to wake up
28.
When I was a kid I thought the long vampire fangs were hollow and had holes in the end that they drank blood through like straws
29.
boys make 3 friends at 16 and decide, yes that's enough socialising for the rest of my life
32.
how are unicorns fake but giraffes are real like what’s more believable a horse with a horn or a leopard-moose-camel with a 40 foot neck
33.
Just once, I want the opportunity to dramatically swipe everything off a table to make room for a giant map that I'll use to explain the plan
34.
so did anyone else go through a phase as a kid where u were genuinely concerned ab the bermuda triangle???? 6 y/o me was like bro???? why are we not solving this PROBLEM??
35.
We thought it was our ability to love that made us human, but it turns out it was actually our ability to SELECT EACH IMAGE CONTAINING A BOAT
36.
Humans in sci-fi: Stupid artificial beings LOL. They don't have FEELINGS, so you can treat them like SHIT Humans in real life: I put googly eyes on my toaster. His name is James now, and I will protect him with my LIFE
37.
if anybody break into my house, we will be searching for the valuable things together
And lastly...
39.
yall wanna talk about generational divides? i dont know anyone under 40 who separates laundry into lights and darks