Reddit users shared the funniest lies they’ve ever heard a parent tell a kid:
1. “My mom said they only named hurricanes after girls otherwise they would be himicanes.”
5. “My grandma told us that smelling each other’s farts would make us stronger. Worst Christmas ever for us, funniest Christmas for her.”
6. “My mom told me that drag racers were two men running down the street in women’s clothing.”
10. “My friend ripped open a handwarmer, and when the powder got on his hands his parents told him his hands would disintegrate by age 30. We looked up what disintegrate meant later that night, and he bawled hysterically while staring at his hands.”
11. “My flatmate grew up on a farm and was told by her parents that their TV only worked when it rained.”
12. “My dad told me people only get 10,000 words per month. If you reach the limit, you can’t physically speak until the new month begins. Anytime I was especially talkative, dad would say, ‘Careful, you’re over 9,000 by now.’”
13. “Grandpa told me that there’s a tube connecting my belly button to my butt, and that if I unscrewed my belly button my butt would fall off.”
15. “Living on the West Coast, my friend showed the East Coast feed of the New Year’s Eve countdown to her kids, then had them in bed just after nine.”
20. “As a kid I put a tooth in a plastic bag and slid it under my pillow for the tooth fairy. When my parents forgot to put money under my pillow, my dad said, ‘You shouldn’t have put the tooth in a bag. The tooth fairy couldn’t smell it.’”
21. “When my daughters were little I told them that if they burped, farted, and sneezed at the same time, they would turn inside out.”
- Norma McCorvey, the woman behind the landmark 1973 Supreme Court case, Roe v. Wade, has died in Texas at 69.
- Mark Sanford held a town hall on Saturday that he organized with Indivisible, a group dedicated to holding members of Congress' feet to the fire.
- Donald Glover has been cast as Simba in Disney's remake of "The Lion King."