Believe it or not, but there's still no Pulitzer Prize for the dad joke. That, my friends, is a travesty because there's a fine art to telling a quality dad joke.
However, if there WERE a Pulitzer Prize for the dad joke, it might go to the funny dads (and honorary dads) over at r/dadjokes. Don't believe me? Here are some of their best groaners:
1. "I was the best man for my brother's wedding in Paris. At the reception, I raised my champagne glass and said 'Eggs, cinnamon, bread, and maple syrup.' It was a French Toast."
2. "I stopped at a little roadside shack that said 'Lobster tails $5.' I gave the guy five bucks and he said 'once upon a time in a far off land, there was a lobster…'”
3. "I told a joke on a Zoom meeting and no one laughed. It turns out I'm not remotely funny."
4. "I got arrested today for walking out of an art museum with a painting. I’m just so confused because earlier when I asked the security guard if I could take a picture he said 'yes.'"
5. "SCUBA is an acronym for Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus. What you may not know is that Tuba is also an acronym for Terrible Underwater Breathing Apparatus."
6. "I was alone in the bath. Imagine my surprise when I felt a tap on my shoulder!"
7. "I told my wife I was building a model of Mount Everest. She asked, 'Is it to scale?' I replied, 'No, it's to look at.'"
8. "A woman in labor yells, 'Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Don't! Can't!" The doctor tells her husband, 'Don't worry, those are just contractions.'"
9. "A woman was three months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after about six months. The woman asked the doctor about her baby."
"Doctor: 'You had twins, a boy and a girl. They're both fine. And, you're brother named them for you.'
Woman: 'No, No, No! Not my brother. He's an idiot! What did he name the girl?'
Doctor: 'Denise.'
Woman: 'Ohh, that's actually a nice name. What about the boy?'
Doctor: 'Denephew.'"
10. "I told my wife, 'Did you know Old McDonald’s farm has been taken over by Artificial Intelligence?'”
"Her: AI?
Me: AI.
Her: Oh."