19 Gifts No Mom Wants On Mother's Day

We don't ask for much, but we ask for more than this.

1. Cleaning supplies.

Comedy Central

You're a mom, not a cleaning lady.

2. A how-to book on parenting.

smartparenting.com.ph

Oh, hell no.

3. Sex.

NBC

Is this a gift for you? Or your partner?

4. Lingerie.

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Basically sex, but you're expected to dress up for it, too. Swell.

5. Cellulite cream.

blissworld.com / Via womanandhome.com

1. Joke gifts are not cool on Mother's Day, 2. This had better be a joke gift if your significant other wants to live.

6. A bouquet of flowers picked from a neighbor's yard.

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Explaining to your neighbor why half of their flower bed has been torn up isn't exactly how you want to spend Mother's Day.

7. Tickets to a monster truck rally.

youtube.com

If you asked for these specifically this is an awesome gift. If not, WTF?

8. Nothing.

MGM

Really? Not even a card? You can really feel the love.

9. A homemade gift made by your kid without supervision.

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Homemade gifts are the best, that is, unless your kid took scissors to the living room drapes to acquire "materials."

10. A coupon book.

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Your family appreciates you so much that they got you 10% of your next visit to Chili's.

11. Breakfast in bed made entirely by your kids.

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This is adorable until you realize you'll be dining on fuzzy, severely burned toast and scrambled eggs mixed with M&Ms.

12. A "Steak of the Month" club.

amazingclubs.com

AKA how your significant other gets you to cook them a steak every month.

13. A frame... without a family photo in it.

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The stock image photo of a family that comes with the frame may be cute, but you'd much prefer one of your own family.

14. Something from the bargain bin.

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They say it's the thought that counts, which is true, except for when the thought was to spend $3.99 or less.

15. A gift certificate to Weight Watchers.

weightwatchers.com

What every mom wants to hear, "You're a great mom! And fat!"

16. Exercise equipment or a gym membership.

Miramax/Universal

This one will go over about as well as the Weight Watchers gift certificate.

17. Something that's more for the kids than you.

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"Hey, Mom, mind if I play with your gift a little while?"

18. Slippers, muumuus, or anything else an octogenarian would love.

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These are even worse when your significant other gives the same thing to their mother.

19. Anything bought the day of.

New Line Cinema

"The kids and I have to, uh, just run out for a sec, hon!" FAIL.