1.
When this fish shop didn't really know whether they sold fish or not.
2.
Or when someone microwaved something they thought was fish and smelt up the whole office.
3.
When this restaurant swore that their food was delicious.
4.
And when this bakery tried to convince you that the brown stuff atop this cake was definitely chocolate.
5.
When this Italian place tried to sell you a thick liquid you could only pray was actually soup.
6.
And when you just hoped to god that the slurpee you were about to drink was in fact a slurpee.
7.
And well, when this guy didn't know whether he was doctor, king or God.
8.
When some fresh-sliced ham made you question what the word daily actually meant.
9.
When you decided to opt out for a soda over a bottle of water for health reasons.
10.
Or when you had to question whether water was ever considered to be not healthy.
11.
When you brought your wallet to dinner anyway because you had your suspicions.
12.
Like, really had your suspicions.
13.
When you had to look back at all the fake food you had consumed in your life.
14.
And when you were left wondering whether your favourite breakfast had really returned.
15.
When you hoped that cleanliness was a prerequisite to working in hospitality.
16.
And when you hoped that your clean cutlery didn't come from this jar.
17.
When you weren't sure whether the hardware store was really open or not.
18.
Or whether the floor was actually wet.
19.
When you were left wondering what else a store called "Story Tellers" could be selling.
20.
When you decided to eat elsewhere because you couldn't be trusting a review like this.
21.
When you didn't know whether the safety information was being sarcastic or not.
22.
When a catalogue made fun of your shitty "bad health" excuses.
23.
When you were hopeful that people were always only donating new underwear.
24.
When you weren't quite sure on what this guy was guarding.
25.
And when the only that made you feel a little less safe was the happy use of Comic Sans.
26.
When a card showed your real place in the family.
27.
And when you were left questioning your own existence.
