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    • maziemayz

      The passing of Robin Williams hit home with me hard. I suffer from addiction and with that comes a whole slew of other things. Robin Williams had 20 years drug free and decided to go back out. I have been around long enough to see people go out and use and come back broken or to not come back at all. For someone like us, drugs and alcohol are just a symptom of an underlying disease. I had someone very close to me try and take their life a few weeks ago. I sat by their death bed and realized how different it was to sit on the side of the bed instead of laying in it myself. I am going on three years clean and sober. Sometimes I wonder why I’m even still doing it. What is my purpose in life? Who am I? I think about how much easier it would be to just end it all. But to see that a beautiful man like this, who brought so much happiness to my life and my childhood, could just disappear, brings me back to reality. Death is permanent. I wish the best to the family of Robin Williams and mourn the loss of another warrior in this crazy world we live in. Just for today, I will remember that all times of darkness are following by blinding moments of clarity. And that the diseases of addiction AND depression are cunning, baffling and insidious. Just for today I value my life.

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