We Need To Talk About Captain America’s Biceps in “Civil War”

    A totally spoiler-free discussion entirely about biceps.

    Mat Whitehead
    by Mat Whitehead

    BuzzFeed Staff, Australia

    Captain America: Civil War is opening in cinemas across the globe. With two of the founding Avengers, Captain America and Iron Man, facing off against each other, the world is divided.

    Marvel

    BUT LISTEN, all that messy ~politics schmolitics~ aside, there's one BIG, bulging reason that you should be #TeamCap.

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    Grab some water, this gonna be thirsty work.

    In the past, Cap has shown us some of his many talents.

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    The first Avenger is a natural leader, a kindhearted and trusting hero whose real power is his hot, hot abs. I MEAN his ability to fight for goodness or something.

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    Also he fuckin' HATES logs!!!

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    When I grow up I want to be that log.

    Well in Captain America: Civil War, Cap gives us ANOTHER reason to love him:

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    HELICOPTER ARMS.

    Zade Rosenthal / Marvel

    IRON MAN'S ARMOUR DON'T GOT GUNS LIKE THESE.

    Zade Rosenthal / Marvel

    HERE'S SOME BEHIND THE SCENES ARMS.

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    I know, some of y'all are gonna come for me for ~objectifying a man~ as if that were a real thing to get upset about...

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    ....except in Civil War's cast of 9,000, about four of those are speaking female roles. And one of those roles is Iron Man's A.I. WHO he hits on, because apparently Tony Stark would rather make-out with an electrical socket than talk to Gwyneth Paltrow.

    Just accept it. Accept the arm. Let it hold you.

    More like Captarm Armerica: Civil Phwoahh.

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    #TeamCap4Eva