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"Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory" Is Actually A Movie Full Of Jerks

Lookin' at you, Grandpa Joe, you selfish scumbag.

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Like, what a jerk move, Grandpa Joe. You couldn't get up for TWENTY YEARS to help your daughter and grandson, but AS LONG AS THERE'S A TRIP TO THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY, TIME TO BUST A MOVE.

ALL THE WHILE, he sings *I* have a golden ticket, as if the prize belongs to him, when clearly, it belongs to his poor grandchild, Charlie.

Try thinking about another person for one second in your depressing life, Grandpa Joe.

Oh yeah, and what's the first thing he does when he gets out of bed? He throws his clothes around the house, makes a mess that his daughter will probably have to clean up. What an asshole.

Not to mention...he keeps chocolate bars under his nasty-ass pillow. WHO KEEPS CHOCOLATE UNDER A PILLOW?! *Especially* a pillow that you've supposedly been sleeping on for like 20 years straight.


AND THEN...when Wonka understandably flips and tells Charlie to get out, Grandpa Joe immediately tells Charlie he should sell out and give Slugworth his Everlasting Gobstopper.

Thankfully, Charlie knows better and gives Wonka his candy back. But Grandpa Joe is still a jerk and the worst role model on Earth.

MOVING ON... Willy Wonka is a racist. I'm sorry, but all of these children are WHITE. If Wonka Bars are sold globally, statistically speaking, at least three of these children should be Asian...

Then, of course, Willy Wonka gets all angry at Augustus Gloop when he jumps into the chocolate river. And Wonka's legion of Oompa Loompas march out with a judgmental tune about gluttony...


Oh...and all that fuss about "contaminating" the Fizzy Lifting Drink tank. Wonka put USED SHOES into a recipe. And then he flips a shit about Charlie touching the walls of the tank with his hands. WTF, WONKA.


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