I showed my mom various acts from the 2014 Lollapalooza lineup — including some who I’ve admittedly never heard of myself — and asked her to identify them to the best of her ability. These were the results of her attempt:
Mom: Are any of them country? Otherwise I’m screwed.
Me: Nope. Good luck!
Mom: OK, is she in a band or is it just her?
Me: Just her.
Mom: Give me the first letter of her name.
Me: No. Her name’s Iggy Azalea.
Mom: Oh, I was gonna say Iggy.
Mom: The other guy’s covered up, maybe he’d give me a clue.
Me: He’s not even the guy. It’s the other guy.
Mom: What does it start with?
Mom: Steven… Osbourne.
Me: Starts with an “O.”
Mom: Second letter?
Mom: Couldn’t they be French black men?
Me: I mean. Yes.
Mom: Diana Ross. I know it’s not her, but she’s got the big hair like her.
Mom: Give me an initial.
Mom: Why aren’t any of them Shakira? Is it a band name or a person name?
Me: It’s a person name, but a weird name.
Mom: Weirder than Shakira?
Me: Her name is Lorde.
Mom: Ohhh. That’s Madonna’s daughter.
Mom: Well, he looks like somebody, but I don’t know…. Nope. Smoky Robinson, that’s who he makes me thinks of.
Mom: You’re looking at your mother who knows people from the 70s and 80s.
Me: Yeah. He’s Childish Gambino.
Mom: I shouldn’t have agreed to this.
Mom: That’s him. That’s Eminem. Wait, no. I have no clue. What does it start with?
Me: Close. It’s Calvin Harris.
Mom: Well, his shirt says country. But nope. Don’t know them either.
Me: Their band name starts with a “K.”
Me: What does that even mean?
(Kings of Leon.)
Me: No. That would be too easy.
Mom: What does it start with?
Me: Starts with a “Z.”
Me: No. He is Zedd.
Mom: Stop laughing.
Mom: I don’t know. And this is country. Never seen any of them in my life.
Me: Starts with an A.
Mom: The Angels.
Me: Nope. The Avett Brothers.
Me: Starts with an “F.”
Mom: Frickin’ Don’t Know.
Me: Close. They’re Foster The People.
Mom: Oh, Lord have mercy. Um. Pass.
Me: It’s a year.
Me: Close, they’re The 1975.
Mom: For real? Put that down as I guessed it. I was close.
Mom: Oh, she looks familiar. But her heads tilted, so I can’t tell.
Me: Starts with a “B.”
Me: Nope. She’s Betty Who.
Mom: I remember seeing something like BiBi. Don’t laugh.
“I’m not even gonna try. I’ll look dumb.”
Mom: Oh my.
Me: Starts with a “C.”
Me: No. They’re called Cage the Elephant.
Mom: Oh, yeah. I knew that.
Mom: What does her shirt say?
Me: “Hug me, I’m Paki.”
Mom: Hug me, I’m who?
Me: No. Just… It starts with a “K.”
Mom: The King Sisters.
Me: Nope. They’re called Krewella.
- Churches across the US are prepping an underground railroad system for immigrants who fear deportation under Trump.
- The widow of a Kansas immigrant allegedly killed by a white nationalist demanded answers from the government about stopping hate crimes.
- At a rally in NYC, trans New Yorkers asked for support from the broader LGBT community — something they haven't always gotten.
- Barack Obama took Malia to see a Broadway show and everyone is talking about how refreshed he's looking 😎