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31 Ways It Really, Truly Sucks To Live In Florida In The Summer

A never-ending cycle of humidity, bugs, and the threat of imminent death. Yes, we pay the price for those wonderful winters.

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5. That little coast-to-coast heat wave everybody was bitching about? Yeah. That’s Florida from May through September. We have to hide until summer ends. We’re basically prisoners down here.

11. As the storm nears, weather guys on TV do the most creepy and frightening thing imaginable: They take off their jackets and roll up their sleeves. That means IT’S ON and the SHIT IS GETTING REAL UP IN HERE.

13. But just because there’s no storm doesn’t mean our Florida TV stations don’t spend all summer scaring the crap out of us anyway: WE LIVE IN PARADISE! PARADISE IS DEADLY!

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15. The never-ending fear in the summer makes us all a little crazy. You don’t WANT to be constantly TRACKING THE TROPICS, but you can’t quite stop, either. Because they're right, we could be KILLED AT ANY TIME.