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Malcolm Turnbull Roasted The Shit Out Of Bill Shorten In Parliament Today

"...blowing hard in the House of Representatives, sucking hard in the living rooms of Melbourne..."

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Prime minister Malcolm Turnbull has delivered a complete roasting of Bill Shorten, full of salty accusations which had the entire Coalition backbench roaring with approval.

"Blowing hard in the House of Representatives, sucking hard in the living rooms of Melbourne" - @TurnbullMalcolm ju…

Labor leader Bill Shorten aimed to suspend standing orders during Wednesday's Question Time, in an attempt to portray Turnbull as out of touch for his welfare reforms which had been announced earlier in the day.

The prime minister took the bait, delivering a full character of assassination of Bill Shorten, and making special mention of the Labor leader's close ties to famous Australian billionaires.

There was never a union leader in Melbourne that tucked his knees under more billionaire's tables than the leader of the opposition. He lapped it up, yes, he lapped it up. He was such a sycophant, a social-climbing sycophant if ever there was one. There has never been a more sycophantic leader of the Labor Party than this one and he comes here and poses as a tribute of the people. He likes harbourside mansions, he is yearning for one, he is yearning to get into Kirribilli House, because somebody else pays for it! Just like he loved knocking back Dick Pratt's Cristal and looked forward to living at the expense of the taxpayer, this man is a parasite and has no respect for the taxpayer!

Turnbull's front and backbenchers couldn't stop laughing and roaring when the prime minister began talking about sucking and blowing.

"This sycophant, blowing hard in the House of Representatives, sucking hard in the living rooms of Melbourne, what a hypocrite," Turnbull said.

Deputy prime minister Barnaby Joyce was laughing so hard that his face turned bright red.

The spray marks the first time Turnbull has really come out of his shell to personally attack Shorten.

Turnbull going after Shorten right now in a far more aggressive and personal way than we've seen

Perhaps he was letting off a bit of steam.

At least six months worth of cat kicking in this speech from @TurnbullMalcolm #qt

Coalition backbenchers continued to smack their tables throughout the speech.

First example in quite a long time of how parliamentary attack can completely change the party dynamics of a week #qt

Right wing commentators were delighted.

Finally, as suggested yesterday; "time for action, time to fight." Turnbull discovers aggression. It becomes him. Shorten vulnerable. #qt

Of course, some recalled others who could tear apart a counterpart in Question Time.

Malcolm's adorable when he's trying to be Keating.

But what about those euphemisms!

i'm being very charitable with my reading of this line but it is only parsing one way for me

Turnbull eventually did sit, Labor sat stunned and the Coalition burst into applause.

However, it shouldn't take attention away from important policy proposals which were announced earlier in the day.

Turnbull is making it impossible for under-25s to get Centrelink but he made dick jokes for TV so he’ll get away with it, probably

Mark Di Stefano is a media and politics correspondent for BuzzFeed News and is based in London.

Contact Mark Di Stefano at

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