Reasons Why Your Parents Will Always Be Better Than You

At like... everything.

1. They are the sole reason you made it through your worst subject in school.

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Let's face it. We all sucked at something when we were in school, whether it was algebra or biology or trying to figure out what the actual fuck Shakespeare was trying to say. Our parents seemed to have the answers to everything, and we all know that those miraculous Bs and As that we got on those assignments were pretty much thanks to them.

2. They can always find that thing you lost

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No matter how hard you thought you looked and were convinced your computer/homework/glasses/favourite top/parking ticket had literally sprouted legs and run off to join the circus. It's like they put tracking devices in each and every single thing you own for this exact reason...

3. Home-cooked meals are simply never as good as when Mom makes them.

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There's nothing like going home for a weekend, after spending several months living off "gourmet" dinners of Kraft Dinner and tuna, and finally having a REAL home-cooked meal (and the leftovers that you get to bring back with you).

4. They will always handle your taxes for you

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Because something magical happens between the moment you pass your T4s over to your parents and the point when you get enough of a tax return to actually pay your rent on time for once, ~*~and you will never know what it is~*~

5. They know your friends better than you do.

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And when that person you thought was your BFF turns out to be a little shadier than you expected, your parents somehow "knew all along that they were bad news and you're better off without them!"

6. They already know what you're going to ask them

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Even before you say anything.

"Hey mom, can I go-" "Nope."

"Hey dad, can I borrow-" "Ask your mother."

Like, hoooowwwww?

7. They know that sometimes, it's for your own good.

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Like when they force you to spend some quality time with them, they know it's 'cause you'll miss those moments when you're older. Or when they made you take one of those horrendous *bAtHS* as a kid, it's so that you didn't beat up on the playground for smelling like a bag of balls.

8. They will always be able to drink you under the table.

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When you turned 19 and all you wanted to do was take tequila shots with your dad, you remembered too late that he's had at least 30 years of being drunk like a champ on your like 3 three years of being drunk like a sloppy hippopotamus, sooo....... *floor*

9. Their word will always be law.

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You could be 25 and living in a completely different city from your parents, and maybe only see them once a month. You could have all your shit together and somehow mom and dad still own you. When mom sends you a text reminding you to pay the interest on your student loans, or dad calls to say "call your mother, she worries," you know you will literally drop whatever you're doing/show you're currently bingeing on Netflix and carry out their commands.

10. They raised you into a formidable adult human.

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When all is said and done, the fact is your parents fucking made you. YoU WouLd NoT EXisT If NoT FoR THeM. And to top it all off, rather than abandoning you in the wild like a feral animal, they took your potential for greatness and actually made you great. Everything that you know now in your old age of 20-something is thanks to the care and guidance of those two amazing people, and that's pretty flipping cool.