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17 Things That Always Happen At The Apple Store When Your Computer's Broken

Don't cry. Not here. Not in front of Ross, your Genius Bar technician.

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1. Your MacBook is broken so you drop EVERYTHING, because this is an emergency.

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2. You make an appointment for the Genius Bar online and....

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3. You walk over to the Genius Bar all sad, so they will feel compelled to fix your computer faster and at a lower cost.

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4. Then you have to wait on those uncomfortable stools forever.


5. And then they ask you what's wrong with your computer.

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6. ...And if you've backed up your data.

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7. Then your Genius Bar technician asks you if you dropped your computer, because it's shattered and clearly your fault...

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...And you're like...

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Because you know your warranty doesn't cover "accidental damage."

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8. Then the Genius Bar technician asks you if you've spilled any liquids on your computer...

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...And again, you're like...

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9. Then the technician takes your laptop into that back secret area, and you're like...


10. And they come back and tell you that it's definitely liquid-damaged, and you're still like...

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11. And they tell you that it's actually going to be cheaper for you to replace your laptop than for them to fix.

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And you're like...

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12. But all you actually say is...

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13. As you blink back the tears...

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...And try to play it off.

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14. Or every once in awhile when the Genius Bar technician fixes your computer and you don't have to pay anything.

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And you're like...


And they're like...


15. At some point during this ordeal, you'll wish you had just gotten a PC. Everyone has one friend that's super aggressive about their non-Apple laptop.

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16. But you still love your Mac so it's whatever.

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17. And even after all this... you're still not getting Apple Care.

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So stop asking me.

Which you'll regret six months from now... when you spill coffee on your laptop... for the third time this year.