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1. A pair of burlap linen throw pillows for anyone who loves a summary linen...as long as it's as dark as summer nights.
2. A pair of Victorian curtains to complement your grown-up-goth home with some dreadfully romantic details.
3. A gorgeous apron front sink, because adding permanent fixtures into your place is gonna prove your love of black is not just a phase, DAD.
4. A stainless-steel kettle that'll be as black as the coffee you make with it.
5. A ladder bookshelf you can basically store everything you own on, saving you ~space~ by blending all your dark decor together into one satisfying black hole.
6. A four-piece canister set to store sugar, spice, and everything nice. And like, a ton of pepper. BLACK pepper.
7. An abstract calligraphy print I have an inkling you're gonna love hanging up in your home.
8. A swivel chair for adding a fun ~spin~ to your dreamily dark home office.
9. A solid wood bench that'll add a sophisticated touch to your entryway. Don't sit on this purchase long, I'm sure it'll be gone before you know it!
10. A cushy three-piece bedding set in a matte black, for anyone who wants their bed to be the same color as the back of their eyelids.
11. A piping bookshelf sure to prove to the naysayers that minimalism is brilliantly bold.
12. An enameled Dutch oven so you can keep your color scheme going strong in every nook and cranny of your kitchen — kitchen tools included!
14. A hand-crafted ceramic essential oil diffuser so you can cover up the smell of your bulldog (who is definitely not supposed to be your roommate) and breathe easy when your landlord comes over and says, "That's a dog...gone beautiful diffuser you have there!"
15. A modern coat rack your friends are sure to ~marble~ at when they're able to hang their stuff up in the hall instead of tossing everything onto your bed. What a grown-up place you have!
16. A pair of blackout curtains for night owls, like myself, who like sleeping in waaay past sunup. Sunrise is for suckers!
17. A futon that's gonna be a great bed when your pets shove you off of your *actual* bed. Again.
18. An elevated cat bed for fancy cats who like sleeping in a secure space (the rounded shape and raised frame makes them feel extra safe) and fancy cat parents who like pet furniture that isn't an eyesore.
19. An orb chandelier that'll delight modern design-minded folks who want a statment piece that'll really light up a room.
20. A gray and black crocodile peel-and-stick wallpaper for giving a wall or old piece of furniture some texture and depth. This is no croc — this material is *made* for sprucing up your rental's plain white walls.
21. A bubble candle — this tiny piece of decor is sure to be a centerpiece in your place.
22. A negative space vase you can brag about to all your ~buds~.
23. A bathroom rug with tiny diamond patterns embroidered on top. Honestly? It's gonna be a real ~tassel~ finding another rug this perfect. Better get two just in case.
24. A mod take on macrame that'll add a subtle nautical touch to your home, because watching The Lighthouse inspired you to decorate your entire place in black and white.
25. A bed canopy (that doesn't require bed posts!) for massively enhancing even the barest of bedrooms. Have a mattress on the floor? It's about to look magic.
26. A really rad Ouija board woven throw that'll delight your dark dearest when you gift them this, thus finally accepting home decor in their favorite shade (i.e. scary).
27. A handcrafted rocking chair made of natural rattan for anyone willing to invest in their favorite color. Rock on.
28. A black tux candle sure to make lounging around your living room smell like a black tie event.
29. A matte black flatware set so even your utensils can look so good you'd gobble them up.
30. A mounted desk that's gonna give you a prime workspace when you need it with the ability to tuck it away when you don't. Who wants to look at all the homework on their desk when procrastinating an assignment? Not I. Close that stuff up!
31. And finally, a shaggy bed set for folks who cringe at the site of a nightlight...make that bedroom as dark as possible!
When someone acts clever and tells you black can't be your favorite color, because it technically isn't a color:
