back to top

19 Struggles All Vintage Shoppers Know To Be True

Flea market? More like flee market.

1. Taking a sweater home and finding eight holes of various sizes.

anchormanmovie.com / Via bryanbolanos.tumblr.com

And of course the return policy = nonexistent.

2. That mothball smell that doesn't go away. After hand washing it. Ten times.

cartoonnetwork.com / Via billythelich.tumblr.com

But hey, at least there are no holes.

3. Being unable to match a missing button.

And then having to replace all of them.
Flickr: Kirsty Andrews / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: kirstea

And then having to replace all of them.

4. All itchy everything.

tumblr.com / Via xe-stuff.tumblr.com

Curse you, mysterious and unlabeled wool blend.

5. Store owners who demand that you pay cash.

reactiongifs.com

Because who carries cash around anymore?

6. Unzipping a purse pocket for the first time and finding wadded up, USED, Kleenex.

nbc.com / Via fallontonight.tumblr.com

Or unidentified loose pills from the '60s.

7. Accidentally busting a 30-year-old zipper in the dressing room.

movies.disney.com / Via giphy.com

*One minute ago* "It'll fit, don't worry! I'm sucking in!" Then: "OH CRAP. Do I have to buy this now?"

8. Polyester.

#YesAllPolyester
escapetotheseventies.com / Via pinterest.com

#YesAllPolyester

9. The weird green marks cheap old jewelry leaves behind on your fingers and neck.

tumblr.com / Via dontgifadamn.com

And pulling a Lady Macbeth until it goes away.

10. Clothes that literally disintegrate when you put them on.

movies.disney.com / Via disneytasthic.tumblr.com

Of course I expect Edwardian lace to last for decades fully intact.

11. And having to pull a Cinderella's stepsister to fit into the shoes.

Because the average U.S. shoe size has increased from 6.5 in the 1960s to an 8.5-9 today.
movies.disney.com / Via lessonsfromdisney.tumblr.com

Because the average U.S. shoe size has increased from 6.5 in the 1960s to an 8.5-9 today.

12. Not being sure if something is actually vintage or just a vintage lookalike.

tumblr.com / Via whatshouldbetchescallme.tumblr.com

Nope, '90s-era Talbots does not count.

13. New sweater? New sneezes.

movies.disney.com / Via gurl.tumblr.com

Turns out wool is very good at trapping years of dust and cat hair.

14. Shops that operate in near darkness.

sonypictures.com / Via giphy.com

The sequined top you bought? Not so sequined after all.

15. Having to remove enormous shoulder pads.

munsters.com / Via 4thkinddenver.tumblr.com

Because who wants to look like Herman Munster?

16. Freezing at outdoor flea markets in the winter.

17. And sweating at them in the summer.

Touchstone / Via tumblr.com

18. Desperately waiting for an occasion to wear a vintage hat.

tumblr.com / Via osmosis-art.tumblr.com

And just giving up and wearing it to the grocery store.

19. The unachievable boob-to-waist ratio.

titanicmovie.com / Via tumblr.com

BRB, just putting on a thousand girdles.

But despite the difficulties, when you find the perfect piece...

Paramount Pictures / Via hollywoodsgoldenera.tumblr.com

...The struggle feels totally worthwhile.

Connect with As/Is