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1. A pair of open, silicone baskets to help you make *traditional* (i.e. open, in boiling water) poached eggs — without any of the fuss.
2. Or if you really cannot deal with the stove, a microwave egg maker that'll let you achieve the glory of a perfectly round scrambled egg (or two) perfect for sandwiches — in just 45 seconds.
3. A Hamilton Beach rapid cooker to make whipping up nutritious hardboiled eggs less...well...hard. Taking protein-rich snacks on the go has never been easier. ~Cobble~ together a Cobb salad with zero effort!
4. A frying pan with built-in recessed cups that'll whip up four perfectly uniform eggs so you can feed the whole family without the whites all running together.
5. Or if you only need to feed one, an adorable silicone ring to make contained, circular eggs so assembling a 'gram-worthy breakfast sandwich is less of a ~scramble~.
6. A handy little hardboiled egg peeler you didn't think you needed, but is absolutely worth ~shelling~ out for.
7. A Norpro microwave omelet maker that'll upgrade your morning routine. Omelet you finish, but this might be the easiest way to make a satisfying breakfast of all time. OF ALL TIME.
8. A copy of the Egg Shop Cookbook for anyone who can't get the delicious breakfast-all-day dishes at their New York restaurant. Now you can make 'em at home!
9. A BuzzFeed Tasty nonstick frying pan that'll make you toss your old PFOA-treated ones (you know, with that dark, weirdly-textured coating) — these are better for you, much longer-lasting, and your eggs will sliiiiiide right out every time — little or no oil required.
10. A Game of Thrones–inspired egg cup, because if you don't think you're going to need a hearty breakfast (and lunch & dinner) to power you through the cry-fest that will be next week's "The Battle of Winterfell," ~yolks on you~.
11. A bread cutter to transform your usual egg-in-the-basket breakfast into a monster of a good time. Spoiler alert: the whites of his eyes are actually made out of egg whites.
12. A pair of socks so you can show a peek of your Ron Swanson side at the office. Your business lunch order? "Give me all the bacon and eggs you have."
13. A "grip 'n' flip" spatula you can clamp down for easy turning. Making an over-easy egg will never be the same again. NO BROKEN YOLKS!
14. A foolproof timer designed to be tossed in with your boiling eggs — as it heats up, it'll glow to show when your eggs are soft, medium, hard, and even the little stages in-between.
16. A Gudetama lazy egg plushie that says exactly what you're thinking when someone makes YOU get out of your bed. LEAVE ME ALONE!!!! At least a good breakfast is in your future, tho.
17. A soft boiled egg set with everything you need to easily enjoy a set white and slightly gooey yolk when you're still shrugging off sleep. The clever topper precisely cuts and removes the top of the eggshell so you can get to the good stuff stat.
18. An adorable onesie to help any new parent see the ~sunny side~ of falling asleep into their breakfast after yet another sleepless night. Cute onesies make egg-cellent baby shower gifts.
19. And a transparent egg holder so you can see how many you have left at a glance when you open the fridge door. Those grocery store "do....I have eggs at home??" panics are at an end.
"Whatcha doing?" "Idk, thinking about runny egg yolks and stuff."
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