1. You use Tinder as a way to exercise your finger rather than as a dating app.
2. You're either SUPER specific with your settings so you never get matched...
...or you have the broadest settings ever because you just don't care any more.
3. You've been on the dating app for so long, you're starting to find these messages quite funny.
4. And when it comes to your own opening lines, you just copy and paste "Hey" over and over again.
5. You don’t bother with a nice profile picture.
6. Filling out your About Me section is far too much effort.
7. You're starting to get matched with people you've already dated.
8. When you do go on a date, you down copious amounts of coffee beforehand.
You need a lot of caffeine to get through small talk.
9. You only ever do drink dates, because you can't afford dinner any more.
10. You always pick the same pub to meet in.
11. You've agreed to go on a date solely as an excuse to get drunk.
Your housemates were out. Who else were you going to get drunk with?
12. You're starting to think this "chemistry" malarky people speak of is just made up.
13. You only experience chemistry with your pet.
14. You spend most of your dates wishing you were at home in your bed eating pizza.
15. Sometimes, you realise midway through speaking to your date that you've told that story before.
16. You've become so picky that one tiny hiccup will write off the entire date.
For example, if their laugh is slightly too loud.
Or they pick their nose.
Or they tell you they've never seen "The Lion King".
17. You used to have date outfits.
But now you practically show up in your PJs.
18. You accidentally farted on a first date and you didn’t care one bit.
19. You don't really bother with good impressions.
20. You don't bother texting them back either.
21. You keep your room super messy on purpose so if people do stay the night, they don’t stay long.
