What I Learned On My Travels In India

I travelled India for two weeks with my boyfriend, Callum. Starting from the south we made our way from Kerala to Mumbai, Goa, Varanasi, New Delhi and Agra. These are the things I learned about travelling, the astonishing country of India, and my tips to whoever is planning a trip there in the future.

1. India is LOUD

From the high volume of people (literally) to the insane number of cars and bikes on the road CONSTANTLY honking their horns, prepare for a very loud time, in the cities especially. Personally, I'm not a fan of sudden loud noises, so walking through the streets of Varanasi with horns honking every second was pretty frustrating. My ears physically hurt from the level of noise on the streets and at the markets, but it is all part of the experience. Ear plugs might be a shout if you're not up for having your ears blown off- you usually get a pair on long haul flights anyway so keeping them in your handbag might be a saviour.

2. Indian culture is veeeeery different

Lydia Deadman

It was a huge culture shock as I arrived into New Delhi International airport in my strapless dress to a swarm of men staring everlastingly at my chest. I mean I understood it wasn't really appropriate so I wore my cardigan over the top but even in the coastal areas an on the beaches, in upwards of 30 degree heat I expected shorts and t shirts would be tolerated if not the norm. But no. Everyone stares, like, STARES. The men with hunger and desire while the women judge you with burning disapproval and underlying jealousy. I mean, they must be sweltering under those thick layers.

Along with the stares, they have absolutely no concept of personal space. I was standing at a small road shop buying some water when an old woman- looked about 100 years old- came and stood so close to me I could feel her white hair on my skin. She said nothing, I felt like she was cursing me, but Callum said it was just the culture.

3. There are cows EVERYWHERE

Lydia Deadman

Cows are sacred in India, hence, no beef (I really missed beef). They just roam the streets, even the smallest of alleys, and chill wherever they want; it is the duty of the people to avoid and respect them. Even in the middle of busy roads, cars will stop on fast and busy highways to avoid hurting the cow. For this reason there is a hell of a lot of cow poo ALL OVER the place, every few steps so you have to be very careful where you step and don't wear shoes you care about. They won't hurt you but be wary because they give no warning before toilet eruptions.

4. They absolutely love white people

Lydia Deadman

And possibly all tourists, but Callum and I are both white and I didn't see this happen to anyone else so basing my assumption on that.

During the entire holiday odd couples here and there would ask me to take a photo with their baby, which I didn't understand but being terminally British I was too polite to say no. This happened a few times over the trip but the attention really erupted when we went to the Taj Mahal. It started with a pair of sisters asking for a photo with me, which I accepted, however I wish I didn't because this encouraged groups of people literally lining up to take photos with me and Callum separately. It was overwhelming, we felt like Beyonce and Jay Z, and we secretly loved it, however it got to a point we just wanted to take pictures together with the Taj.

People were actually taking pictures and videos of us from afar too, which was not okay. At first we were concerned with the motives, we thought perhaps they actually did think we could be famous, but then Callum remembered someone telling him it is literally just the Indian culture to be overly friendly.

5. The roads are dangerous

Lydia Deadman

The roads are absolute chaos, there is no structure whatsoever. No road markings, no one pays attention to lanes, to traffic lights. Junctions are basically a game of chicken. It's not safe at all, and most taxis and Tuk Tuks don't have seat belts so, good luck.

On the way to the Taj Mahal we got a Tuk Tuk because it was only a 10 min trip from the train station and a minivan actually ran into the side of us. Right into Callum. It was quite a hard bump but VERY luckily we walked away unhurt thanks to a small metal grid Callum was leaning against which caught the dismembered pieces of car which would have otherwise gone straight into his ribcage.

The driver then just made us get back in and carried on the journey. We still had to pay him.

6. The slums are real

IndianExpress.com

I knew there was a poverty aspect to India but nothing could have prepared me for what I saw in Mumbai. The most amazing International airport- seriously, Google it- then 20 yards down the road a vast shanty town. It was heartbreaking. I had never seen anything like it. I cannot translate what I saw, pictures are one thing but it is a completely different story when it's right in front of you.

The poverty was devastating, young pre-pubescent girls carrying babies walk through lines of traffic asking for donations. They are filthy and horrifically thin. I sat in my air conditioned taxi and my heart wept. Callum was the same, we hadn't emotionally prepared ourselves for this reality check. HOUSES made from bed sheets and sticks make up communities of struggle. Tens of people living underneath bridges. It was truly humbling and we left brainstorming ideas of what we could possibly do to help.

7. Prepare to see dead bodies in Varanasi

Lydia Deadman

Don't worry, it's a good thing.

Varanasi is the most spiritual place in India. It sits on the River Ganges; a holy river which the town use to cleanse themselves as well as performing the nightly ritual: Ganga Aarti- whereby hundreds of people gather by the Ganges and float bio degradable candles onto the river as a holy offering as a physical representation of wishes to the Gods. It is an hour long ceremony (it's worth seeing, hit it up if you visit Varanasi, 7-8pm at Meer Ghat was the one I went to)

Back to the dead bodies...

On the open top of a building by the river is where the cremations take place. I mean literal dead bodies lay on piles of logs while their families watch as they vividly go up in flames. This was extremely shocking for us however a local 'priest' came and informed us about the tradition- it is a highly happy and respected tradition of the town which every single person commits to. 100-300 bodies per day typically burnt leaving nothing but a shoulder bone from men and a hip bone from women, which are then thrown into the river. If any member of the family watching cries at the ceremony, the spirit of the body will be unhappy and unsettled in the afterlife, so really it is a well designed tool in creating peace of mind and acceptance for the bereaved. It is a right of passage for all citizens of the town as a process of separating the soul from the body and cleansing it for the afterlife. The only people exempt from this process are pregnant women and children, who are instead wrapped in cloth, tied to rocks and poured into the river. It is quite expensive apparently as they import specialised wood which extracts the smell, otherwise the town would stink of burning bodies. If poorer people bring a loved one but cannot afford the cremation, other families will donate money towards their ceremony to bring themselves good karma.

Still, seeing a mans face and feet poking out from the flames was a little frightening for our little British minds. Obviously we didn't take any pictures of this.

All in all, I recommend Varanasi as a definite place to visit if you're heading to India.

8. India is generally a safe place

Before going to India I was very frightened as i'd heard horror stories of women being disembowelled on busses and murdered for simply being 'too provocative', so the mindset of the culture was a concern for me. I took off all my jewellery before leaving the UK and I considered leaving my phone but I decided I needed it for pics and music and it was absolutely fine.

Although there were a lot of poorer areas and we did see a child steal an expensive camera from someone at the Taj Mahal, it was generally a safe place. The beggars will approach you but they will not demand or abuse you. Nor will the salesmen. There are a lot of police situated around most corners in the cities for your safety in the event of trouble.

Obviously you have to be sensible; I didn't leave Callum's side the entire time I was there, we stayed in populated areas and avoided any dodgy- looking situations.

There is no need to be scared, but a very strong need to be sensible of your own safety at all times.

FYI: The number for police in India is 100.

9. Splash for AC, you won't regret it.

We upgraded from two different hotels because we had booked basic rooms online, but upon arrival we were willing to pay endless amounts of money for a nicer, cooler room.

India is hot at all times of the year, even when it rains. And if you're travelling, you'll need a decent base camp to rest and feel safe in. It's worth spending a bit more to feel comfortable, some nights we were up hours with the heat and that was even with a huge ceiling fan on full blast!

We found that the difference between standard and deluxe in most hotels was literally astounding, the jump seemed like the rooms belonged to two completely different hotels; basic rooms are often reserved for the staff and they don't really expect customers to settle for them, forcing them to pay a little more and get the FAR better room. Nothing beats air con and when you're in the thick of it, exhausted from the heat and desperate to crash, you'll thank yourself for getting the nicer room. Don't settle.

10. Trains, busses and public transport

Lydia Deadman

We took the train from New Delhi to Agra in a desperate attempt to see the Taj Mahal in one day. It took over 3 hours and it was hot and smelly, and we were in the sleeper carriage.

Waiting on the platform, a train arrived on the opposite side to us and as it rolled in, crowds of people gushed into the doorless carriages while others struggled to fight their way off the train and onto the platform. The alarming scene in Slumdog Millionaire was no joke- and I was bricking it. Luckily, on the platform we made friends with a man who lived in the area and knew his Indian life- hacks. He took us to a different carriage meant for sleeping and found us seats, we didn't have to push or fight our way anywhere which I was extremely happy with. So if there are no 1st class tickets available, always go to sleeper carriage. If you have a standard ticket and the inspector fines you, it will be around £1 so it's more than worth the punishment. Don't be afraid to ask the staff about the public transport; ask if it's safe and the different categories of ticket available. More importantly, if you feel unsafe, get off. Generally, taxis and Tuk Tuks are pretty cheap (and safe most of the time) so I would suggest private transport if you can.

11. Visit Goa

Lydia Deadman

Goa was the most beautiful place we went to during our whole travels. Everything is green, palm trees everywhere, white sandy beaches. It was paradise and we enjoyed it as a place of relaxation and exploration. The markets are calmer than in the cities and the hotels on the beaches create a sense of authenticity; like you are really experiencing the area rather than staying inside a hotel complex the whole time.

Beach areas connected to hotels will be quiet and exclusive as they are owned or protected by the hotel- which means no hassling of salespeople. However during our walk along the seemingly peaceful beach we passed a certain point and in fled the sales. Women upon women approach you and ask for you to see their 'shops'. One woman hassled us tirelessly until we agreed just to shut her up- only to follow her for 20 yards behind the beach and find out her shop was actually a plastic bag of ankle bracelets inside her home. We refused to go inside and made our way back immediately.

12. Travelling really takes it out of you

Callum Lloyd- James

In two weeks we visited 6 places and boarded 8 flights. We took several days to recover from that. It's okay to take time to rest, the heat exhausts you if nothing else will.

Don't push yourself to do everything all the time, it's important to feel well in a foreign country; value your sleep and accept that you may need to take a day or two to refuel.

On our last day in Kochi (Kerala), just as we were packing our bags for the airport, we realised that our plane was a day later than we had been planning for, and our current hotel was booked up for the evening. We didn't panic, we calmly booked a night in a nearby hotel (which turned out to be amazing), spent the day in bed watching Pixar movies and ordered room service- we allowed ourself the day off because we hadn't accounted for it. And it was one of my favourite days of the entire trip.

13. Finally, chose your partners wisely and don't expect it to be all highs

Lydia Deadman

To finish off, the final thing I learned on my travels was that I went with the best person I could have picked. Travelling is exhausting, and you will experience highs and lows in your travels and in yourself so make sure you are with someone, or a group of people that you know will look after you and will make it an enjoyable experience for you even at the hard times.

We helped each other on many occasions, whether it was keeping one another calm, making each other laugh or just being there for one another without saying a word. It was clear that, after two weeks of constantly being with the same person every second of every day and not being sick of one another, that we were a good match. Travel with the person(s) who have the same aims for the trip as you do, who want to spend the same amount of money as you do, and who will make you power through after an exhausting, sweaty all- nighter in a foreign airport.

If you travel with the wrong person, you will not enjoy it as much. Fact.

The gorgeous and enjoyable elements of your trip will be exceptional no matter who you are with; but the difficult times are when you need to trust and appreciate the strength and comfort of your partners. I enjoyed the toughest parts of my trip; the smelly streets, the long journeys, the pushy crowds because I was with the person who makes me happy rather than relying on the trip to be a series of exclusive highs. I was okay with the lows because my person is, to me, a high.