Everything You Need To Know About The Entire Skarsgård Family

    A Skarsguide if you will.

    Hello and welcome to the Skarsgård family tree! By the way, a 5-year-old did not make the below photo, I DID! All by myself!! I hope you like it.

    Anyway, we are here to discuss the Skarsgårds. Who are like the moles in a carnival game of Hollywood... they pop up everywhere!!!!

    Obviously, as you saw from my really good family tree, Stellan Skarsgård is the patriarch of the family.

    Stats:

    Birthname: Stellan John Skarsgård

    Age: 66

    Height: 6'3"

    Occupation: Actor

    You know him as Bootstrap Bill from Pirates Of The Caribbean.

    And also Bill from Mamma Mia! Guess he likes playing characters named Bill.

    Also you may or may not know that Stellan is the father of v famous dude Alexander Skarsgård. Without going into too much detail about the miracle of life, let's just say...Stellan helped make him! Also, this is the entire point of this article.

    New official Skarsgård hotness rating: 6.2 Skars!

    But obviously he isn't just the father of Alexander. There are so many more! In fact there are six siblings in the Skarsgård family all born to Stellan and their mother, My Agnes. So, let's meet all of them.

    Alexander Skarsgård

    Stats:

    Birthname: Alexander Johan Hjalmar Skarsgård

    Age: 41

    Sibling rank: Oldest sibling

    Height: 6'4"

    Occupation: Actor

    Known for True Blood.

    That bod...

    And other things! He's Alexander Skarsgård!

    New official Skarsgård hotness rating: 10 Skars!!

    Gustaf Skarsgård

    Stats:

    Birthname: Gustaf Caspar Orm Skarsgård

    Age: 36

    Sibling rank: Second oldest

    Height: 6'4"

    Occupation: Actor

    You might know him from Vikings.

    And for having the least amount of hair out of all the Skarsgårds, but making it look really good.

    New official Skarsgård hotness rating: 8 Skars!

    Sam Skarsgård

    Stats:

    Birthname: Samuel Kristoffer Ymer Skarsgård

    Age: 35

    Sibling rank: Third oldest

    Height: 6'5"

    Occupation: He's a Doctor!

    You don't know Sam from anywhere because he's a doctor and doesn't act. Instead I guess he's getting married and saving lives? There are so few photos of him on the interweb that honestly I'm not sure if he really even exists. JK he does.

    Based on the very few photos around...the new official Skarsgård hotness rating: 7.5 skars!

    Bill Skarsgård

    Stats:

    Birthname: Bill Istvan Günter Skarsgård

    Age: 27

    Sibling rank: Kinda the middle child

    Height: 6'4"

    Occupation: Actor

    You prob know him most recently as Pennywise in It.

    But also from these gratuitous pics I'm gonna show you now:

    New official Skarsgård hotness rating: 8.7 Skars!

    Eija Skarsgård

    Stats:

    Birthname: Eija Skarsgård (middle name/names unknown)

    Age: 25

    Sibling rank: Second youngest

    Height: 5'10"

    Occupation: Unknown, but could be a model

    Like I said, she could be a model. But I have no idea what she does or anything else about her. Just that she's the only girl in the family and probably is tired of people telling her how hot her brothers are.

    New official Skarsgård hotness rating: 9 Skars!

    Valter Skarsgård

    Stats:

    Birthname: Valter Skarsgård (maybe they gave up on all the middle names as they had more kids?)

    Age: 21

    Sibling rank: Baby of the fam

    Height: UNKNOWN, but prob tall.

    Occupation: Actor

    TBH Idk if you know him from many places. BUT he did appear in his friend's Youtube video and it's really cute and actually I think he's my fav Skarsgård?

    View this video on YouTube

    youtube.com

    Also once he was in some movie wearing this turtleneck.

    New official Skarsgård hotness rating: 12 Skars!!!!!

    You might notice that absent from this list is Peter. Because actually he has no relation to the Skarsgårds at all. His last name is Sarsgaard. It's different.

    And now you know! Thanks for taking the time out of your day to read this. Ciao!