25 Things Everyone Who Works In Media Planning Will Understand

Let’s be honest, it’s the most important bit of advertising.

1. The more work you put into creating an inventive and original plan, the less likely the client is to sign it off.

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“We love this! It’s so different! Now book exactly what you did last time.”

2. A client thinking they know what they’re doing is, much, much, worse than them knowing nothing.

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“I mean, yes, technically, that could work, but let’s not commit to trying to buy a roadblock on the whole of Google just yet?”

3. Your knowledge of Excel is second to none, and you hate that.

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But secretly, you kind of love it.

4. Conference calls with dozens of different participants are a form of torture.

Though getting a call cancelled late in the day might be the happiest feeling you can get at work.

5. You will have lost all interest by the time the call has been going on for an hour.

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And at that point, you will mainly be hoping that no one asks you a question.

6. An open bar will probably end badly for whoever is hosting it.

 

For example, what happened at the Summer Party of a certain digital network in Shoreditch in 2011.

7. You will frequently work more hours than you ever thought possible, and start to doubt if anything else exists in the world.

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8. When someone else tells you how hard they work, you’ll be forced to stifle a laugh.

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It’s nothing compared to your hours. It never is.

9. A rep going directly to a client will instantly make them a mortal enemy.

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“I’m sure you have made the client very interested, but I still know you’re very expensive, so all you’ve actually done is make my job harder. Now I hate you.”

10. Lunches are great, except for that one irrelevant rep who just won’t stop bugging you.

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11. Complaining about not being on a media plan is a very easy way for a rep to alienate everyone.

Be… better? That’s basically the only advice.

12. Every meeting is twice as long as necessary.

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13. The only way you can get a pay raise is by changing agencies.

Or, if you really want to get paid, try going client-side.

14. You’ve memorised hundreds of acronyms, for seemingly everything in existence.

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Yeah, or maybe that…

15. Reps will attempt to explain awesome technology to you, convinced it is both innovative, and useful.

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When it is neither. And generally just doesn’t make sense.

16. So you never believe any claims about the shiny new digital products being bandied around.

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Besides, if it is any good, it’ll be replicated by Google in about six weeks. But cheaper, and better.

17. Creatives will, completely sincerely, pitch an idea that needs triple the budget, runs for half the duration of the campaign, and involves a damn blimp.

And it will be up to you to delicately explain to the client the many ways in which it’s a very shitty idea.

18. Even when they’re terrible, you will laugh at every single one of your client’s jokes.

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19. You’ll frequently refer to the “Halo Effect” when the results aren’t good, despite being convinced it’s not a thing.

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“Sure, we didn’t actually sell anything, but when you look at the Halo Effect…”

20. It’s guaranteed that, despite the best, most responsible intentions, every company away day will end up a drunken disaster.

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Still be fun though.

21. Which will only be overshadowed by the escalating nights of drinking leading up to Christmas.

Yet somehow, things will still be getting done despite half the office no longer remembering their names.

22. You have definitely experienced someone wearing fancy dress in the office.

And it was weird.

23. At a certain point when putting together decks, you will just start to give up and guess.

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24. Trying to get someone to answer your calls and actually do anything on a Friday afternoon is almost the most irritating thing that can happen.

FX

 

If it’s after 1pm, everyone is probably in the pub.

25. But absolutely NOTHING will come close to the epic, burning, focused hatred you have for timesheets.

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Luke Bailey is a senior editor for BuzzFeed UK and is based in London.
 
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