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Here's Why Australia Shouldn't Be In Eurovision

It turns out, Australia might not be in Europe.

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We need to be certain where Europe is, maybe that's the problem. Let's work it out. The north and west are easy - everything below the Arctic, and everything east of the Atlantic.

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In the east and south, it's "the watershed divides of the Ural and Caucasus Mountains, the Ural River, the Caspian and Black Seas, and the Bosporus waterway connecting the Black and Aegean Seas."

google.co.uk

So, bits of Russia and Turkey are definitely in. Georgia and Azerbaijan are on the border, so let's let that slide. Armenia is a bit tenuous. Israel is nearly in, but only if you assume everything mediterranean counts, so really, Tunisia should be in if that's your criteria. Kazakhstan has a better shout, to be honest.

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Why the fuck is Australia in Eurovision? Seriously, what the shit is happening? Why is this suddenly a thing?

Oh, maybe we can just be innovative, maybe we can try something new, but why, WHY? It's not like bringing in a country that's on the edge of Europe, that's just a bit new. It's entirely on the other side of the fucking planet! Sure, it's just Eurovision. BUT FUCKING WHAT. The time isn't even going to make sense, those fuckers are going to be in bed when it's on. #innovation #makingnewfriends #fuckeverything.