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34 Totally Absurd Things Restaurants Have Used Instead Of Plates

The epidemic is still happening. Twitter account @WeWantPlates is doing god's work.

1. A burger on a scale, so you can weigh exactly how much meat you're damaging your health with.

@WeWantPlates oh for fuck sake! This has got to be the worst one since the rocks!

Presumably the chair you're sitting in also weighs you as you ingest it, for the sake of narrative symmetry.

2. Olive > Slate > Paddle + Rosemary.

6 olives on individual slates on a paddle with some rosemary. Next level stuff this. @WeWantPlates

3. The gravy is in a goddamn can. Of beer. Where is the beer.

The chopping board is the least of it. Inside the Camden Hells can is... gravy. #WEWANTPLATES etc.

4. Gardening implements should not be on the table.

@WeWantPlates mushrooms in a fucking spade, this takes the piss #wtf

5. So you shouldn't ever put a fry-up on a shovel.

.@WeWantPlates A fry-up on a shovel.

Also, peas on a fry-up? This is a mess from start to finish.

6. The plates with a fry-up are there for a reason, dammit.

Full English served on greaseproof paper. Nothing like greasy juices sliding into your lap @WeWantPlates

7. Technically, this is probably better. Prison aesthetic, but practical.

Breakfast on a tray. Am I in jail? @WeWantPlates

8. But sacred British food is being attacked.

This is going TOO FAR @WeWantPlates is nothing sacred?!

9. A roast on a wooden board? A pail of veg? Not OK.

@WeWantPlates even roasts aren't sacred anymore

10. Incredibly, the tray is not even the worst part of this one. It's all about the suitcase cocktail.

Burger and chips served on a metal tray and a rum cocktail served in a suitcase. What a time to be alive...

11. This is the worst possible version of "a stack of cheese."

@WeWantPlates Apparently they specialise in ‘deconstructing’. This was one of their better suggestions.

12. What is with all the stacking?

@WeWantPlates mini picnic table. Where is my plate?

13. The real question is whether this was intended to have fallen over, or whether a clumsy waiter has just given up.

Just received my crab mousse starter in a fallen over plant pot on a plank @WeWantPlates #York

14. Restaurants are willing to sink to new depths to tap into this market.

Forgive me, but there's a plate in this one. IN A SINK. (Pic: @nvcatc) #wewantplatesnotinsinks

15. SEE?


16. Pork scratchings don't deserve this treatment.

@WeWantPlates pork scratchings on a plank, with a mini wheelbarrow of apple sauce.

17. And desserts definitely don't deserve this.

@WeWantPlates Dessert came like this...

18. Or this.

@WeWantPlates how am I supposed to pour my bloody custard into this?

19. A pasta axe. For when you want pasta, but also, an axe.

@WeWantPlates Shut it down. Shut it down forever. Centimeter in MQ, Vienna.

20. This is a magisterial effort to get as many things that aren't plates onto the table as possible.

Id like my sausages served in a colander, chicken in a wicker basket and sauce in a watering can plz....@WeWantPlates

21. That has, admittedly, been beaten by whatever the fuck is going on here.

Like an explosion in a butcher's shop. The tin? It's a mess. @WeWantPlates

22. It's all going wrong here.

From 2013 - croquettes served in a sneaker at a resort in Las Vegas: (cc @WeWantPlates)

23. Pest control devices are not suitable for eating from.

Baked Camembert served on a rat trap. Somebody call @WeWantPlates!

24. Or parts of cars. Leave the hubcaps on the car.

That is food. That is a hubcap. THAT IS FOOD ON A HUBCAP. (Pic: @plant_matter) #WeWantPlates

25. Any form of transport actually. Give up on it.

Cakes and pastries on a skateboard. Rad. (ATTN: @WeWantPlates)

26. Who really wants to eat off a dustbin lid?

Mixed Grill. In a dustbin lid. Nuff said. @WeWantPlates

27. Anything that is supposed to be used to throw things away shouldn't be used to serve food.

Prawn cocktail in a skip. *jaw drops* (Pic: @PaulWFranklin, ta @JamesHeltby) #WeWantPlates

And really, we shouldn't have to say this.

28. Here's a nice refreshing pint of hash browns.

@WeWantPlates served on a board, pot for gravy and a pint of hash browns

29. Or maybe one of trifle?

30. Not refeshed? How about a nice lightbulb of fizz?

No no no this is not how we're supposed to live @WeWantPlates #wewantglasses

31. Martini of cake?

This is in my fb timeline and I'm just here yelling NO. FUCK OFF. GIN GOES IN THERE. (@WeWantPlates)

32. Just some water, then? Here's your watering can.

@WeWantPlates we got a plate but ended up having a drink out of a watering can and a bucket for a glass 😂😂😂

33. Look, your food should just not be involved in acrobatics, in any capacity.

Scampi swinging in a bucket, really @WeWantPlates

34. So just what is actually happening here?

@WeWantPlates saw this on a friends fb yesterday. This is soup served in something you'd find in the crystal maze

Why are restaurants doing this to us? Follow @WeWantPlates for more.