back to top

56 Thoughts I Had Watching Shia LaBeouf Watching Shia LaBeouf Movies

Is this all art?

Posted on

1. This will be terrible.

2. This is amazing.

3. This seems like a really bad way to spend three days.

4. It could be worse, I guess. Some of his movies are good.

5. I'll defend A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints to the death. And Holes.

6. No one should have to watch the third Transformers though.

7. He looks like he hates it so much.

8. I can't think of a cinema I'd ever like to spend three days in.

9. The seats aren't comfortable, and they smell like old food.

10. I can't decide if his beard is gross or perfect.

11. Leaning towards perfect. But maybe it is also gross.

12. Either way, it is going be disgusting after three days of this.

13. God, so are his clothes. I hope he has some breathable shoes on.

14. Or a fair few changes of socks.

15. Or, I suppose, some shoes that definitely aren't breathable to keep the stank in.

16. Not Converse, basically. Converse will be rotting on his damn feet after three days.

17. At least he doesn't seem to have the rat tail any more.

18. Should he be allowed to sleep?

19. Surely he should have to not sleep. He's not even fucking here most of the time.

20. The people around him are all infuriating.

21. The worst is clearly terrible hippy-leaning-over-into-shot-dude.

22. But the one matching all his movements behind is also annoying. But that is, at least, interesting?

23. So's the Kurt Cobain lookalike. Like, what a weird reference.

24. The guy in the Rangers shirt is moving too much.

25. Shia is primarily eating popcorn, which seems like a terrible way to survive.

26. But also a burrito?

27. And some pizza. And quite a lot of soda.

28. His internal organs must be feeling trash right now.

29. At least he bought pizza for everyone else. What a bro.

30. Art shouldn't involve burritos, because burritos ARE art.

31. Is this art? I mean, that's the real question here.

32. Art is, basically, the expression of human creativity.

33. This is sort of creative. Something unexpected.

34. Wait, is it? Because everything is pretty normal.

35. He's in a cinema, watching films. So that's normal. Even a binge watch is normal.

36. It is in reverse chronological order. That makes it art?

37. I suppose the art is the livestream.

38. Why is he wearing the coat? Is it that cold in there?

39. The livestream is not the art though, is it? The art is what it means beyond the livestream.

40. The art is what we say about it.

41. The queue outside is art. But so is the conversation about the queue.

42. Maybe this post is art.

43. But only part of art. It's only art insofar as it's part of a larger art. A unit of art. An artlet.

44. It's like the "Just Do It" video.

45. It was on a greenscreen, it was for people to talk about and interpret.

46. Are memes art?

47. Or rather, is the concept of a meme art?

48. An individual instance of a meme isn't, but the wider unconscious collaboration is.

49. Because we are the collaborators.

50. The guy who gave him a note with "Just Do It" on was a collaborator.

51. But so were the people screengrabbing it.

52. And it only has meaning when other people see it.

53. Because meaning is transitive, and that transitive meaning makes memes into art.

54. Fuck, Transformers: Dark of the Moon was fucking shit.

55. I could really do with some popcorn now.

56. The world is a beautiful place and I am no longer afraid to die.