This Is What Your Man's Body Language Actually Means

It is very important to overanalyze everything he does.

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1. He's standing with his arms folded:

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If the guy you're scoping out is standing with his arms crossed over his chest, he may be feeling insecure. He's physically and figuratively protecting his heart.

2. He's standing with his hips straight forward:

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If you're talking to a man and he's standing with his hips facing you — he's feeling confident and sexy!

3. He leans forward when he talks to you:

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Your man is secretly imagining he is a stapler. By leaning over he implies wanting to be an office supply. The best thing you can do right now is bring him a piece of paper — he'll love that you know just what he's thinking.

4. He has his hands in his pockets:

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If your man is putting his hands in his pockets, he is definitely hiding a secret and it's probably something terrible. In most cases it means he is wearing a human mask and is actually a talking goat. That said, most talking goats are very nice, so no need to write him off just yet.

5. He casually touches his face:

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If the guy you're with touches his face in any capacity, that means he wants you to boop his nose.

6. He fiddles with his watch:

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If your dude is playing with his watch, he is hoping you will join him in trying to make a time machine to go back in time and make sure the blue M&M never happened. He may also just be looking at the time, but probably not.

7. He yawns:

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While it may seem like your man is just tired and yawning — he is actually pretending to be a goldfish and wants you to throw dried worms at him.

8. He crosses his legs:

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If a guy sits in a cross-legged position near you, he is concerned you are going to punch him in the balls. Make sure to let him know you're not currently interested in sucker-punching him in the balls, although that is subject to change later on.