Every year, I'm guessing, I lose about 10-30 seconds of internet video attention span. Ever since I got started, I've lost precious time paying attention to online videos, so this collection of what I deem to be 2011's best should truly be held in high regard by those who understand my plight. Here's to more viral videos in 2012 that are even shorter (or to more friends willing to share timestamps that note where to start watching!)
Future whistler, Alexa, and her father, Jorge, duet on Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros' "Home" -- collectively ripping hearts to shreds.
Let's never talk about Rebecca Black again. Let's only talk about Arc Music Factory's should-have-been-superstar, CJ Fam, whose "Ordinary Pop Star" blows "Friday" out of the calendar. It's Saturday, or something.
Zachary Freiman's Bar Mitzvah video is the best gift a 13 year-old can give to himself. A gift that will keep on giving, like an embarrassing photo of yourself that EVERYONE WILL FOREVER have access to.
No one will ever forget the fateful day that all the memes died and we had to start over again. History books still shy away from details, but it involved Jennifer Aniston and Smart Water.
2011 is also when we learned that Taiwan's Next Media Animation is more reliable, informative, and entertaining than all other news sources.
In the sphere of news, The Onion's "Al Qaeda Attacks Internet With Photo Of Adorable Piglet" is also important and worth noting.
Two of the year's most flawless women, Michelle Obama and Beyoncé, came together to turn 2007's "Get Me Bodied" into a fitness-encouraging national campaign, more appropriately re-titled, "Move Your Body."
Music and performance evolved even further when the Internet discovered American Sign Language interpreter (and artist!) Soph1951.
"Teach Me How to Dougie" got an educational makeover without losing any of it's original charm when 8th graders at LA's Celerity Nascent Charter School turned it into "Teach Me How To Study."
The Internet's wonderful Supercuts come and go. 2011 certainly had plenty of them. One of the year's best was: "Women Falling Down in Romantic Comedies."
In my personal opinion, all Tom Hanks Internet content should go auto-viral, but especially bilingual masterpieces like when the actor's appearance on Univision resulted in him helping with Chiquinquira Delgado's daily weather segment.
The SH'BOSS BOYS (aka Young J, Tobias & Lil' Josh) may have been on America's Got Talent, but it was their YouTube music videos that TRULY deserve the web's attention.
Thanks to Madonna and the 20th anniversary of "Truth or Dare," superfan Robert Jeffery released a breathtaking clip of himself at age 9, performing "Vogue" in front of green screens at New Hampshire's Hampton Beach Casino.
A friend-who-will-go-unnamed sent this to me with the email subject: "This is you if you had YouTube when you were younger." I agree, truly relieved to have been born in a pre-Internet era.
Elijah Wood is already great, so naturally Elijah Wood drunk is EVER GREATER.
Studies show that jazzy cows produce more hoppin' meat and extra swingin' milk.
LIKE MAH STATUS if you posted this video on your Facebook profile.
"How to lose $2,400 in 24 seconds"
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