Joseph Pujol discovered his special talent one scorching summer day as he swam in the ocean. Only a child, he decided to be brave and dive deep into the sea to see how long he could hold his breath. As he did, he experienced a singular cold sensation in his nether regions. Panicked, he swam to the surface and scuttled onto land. He watched, horrified, as cup after cup of seawater gushed from his rectum.
After the doctor pronounced him perfectly healthy, Pujol did what any boy would do. He perfected his skills. By the time that he was a young man in the army Pujol amused his entire regime by sucking water up through is anus and launching it several feet.
Unsatisfied, he pushed his craft further. After returning to civilian society, Pujol became a baker but it wasn't the quality of his goods that had his customers returning. Pujol would hide behind the counter and suck in air into his intestines in order to create musical instrument sounds or the crash of thunder for the delight of his clients.
Obviously, such important talent couldn't go to waste. It wasn't long before Pujol took to the stage, calling himself a professional farter or 'fartist' if you will. By contracting his exceptional abdominal muscles, Pujol hit the road playing instruments with his anus and even mimicking animal sounds to go along with a sweet little poem he wrote about life in the barnyard.
At the height of his long career he was known as 'Le Petomane', which translates to 'fartomaniac' in English and played for royalty and celebrities alike.
Just when you thought no one could make money by making an ass of themselves.
Back in the day, and by back in the day we mean pre-internet, you had to work for fame. The percentage of those in the public eye was exceedingly small and if you were exceptional enough to get there, you had to have a 'certain set of skills' to stay there.
My how times have changed. And they don't appear to be changing back anytime soon.
Perhaps it's time to apply that tried and true 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em' philosophy to your own ventures. Start a narcissistic empire with Instagram or YouTube – why not? Why not join the ranks of people including themselves among the famous and infamous on Wikipedia? With an expertly crafted page singing your praises (or exposing your eccentricities) there's no reason why you shouldn't get the attention that you deserve. That's why you should hire Wiki experts from the professional Wikipedia writing service, Get Your Wiki. After all, if a dude that can make cow noises from his ass can find fame, why can't you?