What it usually means: Person who birthed you, cares for you, worries about you.
What it means when you’re Jewish: The person who wants to know what you want to eat when you come home in a month; the person who constantly asks you when you’re getting married and having children.
What it usually means: Permanent body art that makes you look cool.
What it means when you’re Jewish: The one thing your mother will disown you for.
5. Friday Night
What it usually means: The end of the work week; party night.
What it means when you’re Jewish: Shabbat; or … just … whatever everyone else is doing (depending on how involved your family is/was).
What it usually means: The children of one’s child.
What it means when you are Jewish: What your parents really, really want you to give them.
What it usually means: The first year of being a teenager.
What it means when you’re Jewish: The year of your Bar/Bat Mitzvah in which you “become a man/woman” (ha yeah right); the year you have to study and stress out about getting your Torah portion right; the year you get a badass party; the year people give you $$$$.
What it usually means: To many people, a hot aromatic tea one can procure in fine coffee establishments such as Starbucks.
What it means when you’re Jewish: Hebrew for “life”; the word on a pendant you have somewhere; the thing that makes money come in multiples of 18.
What it usually means: Delicious breakfast treat containing many, many carbs.
What it means when you are Jewish: The thing seemingly served at any meal, for any reason; bread that must be consumed with cream cheese and lox and if you do not like it who are you???
What it usually means: The thing Madonna is into.
What it means when you’re Jewish: Well, it’s uh … it’s … mysticism? It’s hard to explain, it’s like … It’s the thing Madonna does.
What it usually means: A bond shared between women; what once allowed a pair of traveling pants to fit four very different girls.
What it means when you are Jewish: The ladies who magically make all the treats show up at the oneg; a group of awesome Jewish women who believe in helping others and doing good.
- We've compiled an extensive (but not exhaustive) list of lies, exaggerations, and bullshit from Trump's first 100 days in office 💯🗒
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- Sean Spicer blamed the Obama administration for not vetting Michael Flynn before he became Trump's national security adviser 🤔
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