21 Ways In Which You're Not A Functional Adult
Everyone else seems to find it all so easy. These are the ways you're screwing it up.
1. Alcohol and work are an ideal combination.
2. When something in your house breaks, you have no idea how to fix it.
3. You can never readily put together a meal from what's already in your fridge.
4. And your grocery shopping looks like this:
5. You aren't really able to do all those healthy things you're supposed to be doing by now.
6. You Still Have No Idea Where Your Money Goes
7. Which means by the time it's payday, you're buying food using spare change.
8. This doesn't prevent you from having an iPhone, overpriced headphones, and dim sum at inappropriate times.
9. Not only do you make relationship mistakes, you deal with them terribly.
10. Your inability to plan ahead means you often spend significant amounts of time doing nothing.
11. Or panicking because there are too many things.
12. Getting up is still the worst thing in the world.
13. When you tried to keep a plant, it died.
14. Any minor injury causes you major concerns.
15. At least 25% of your job is a mystery to you.
16. Not only do you not know about politics, you're not sure why you're supposed to.
17. Going out on a Monday is an awesome idea.
18. And somehow you're always hungover on a Tuesday?
19. You never have clean laundry when you need it.
20. Your attempts to put together mouth-watering dishes for that dinner party you've always wanted to host don't go well.
21. Crucial paperwork for running your life confuses you.
So, you call your parents and they fix everything.