10 Heartbreaks That Only Those Who Play Talisman Could Understand

As much as I love this epic boardgame, there comes a time in the game when your friends stop becoming your friends and everybody indulges in a head-to-head battle to screw each other over

1. When the Grim Reaper comes knocking at your door...

And yes, of course, despite not rolling a one at any other time during the game, you've rolled a bloody one now! Fantastic!

2. The bloody frog!!!

When you decide to chance your luck in the tavern and lo and behold, you roll that special number: one, and turn into a flipping frog!

3. The whirlwind...

Okay, so not only does the whirlwind decide to whip up but coincidently you roll a 1,2 or 3 for all of your items so they all fly away. Yes including that Talisman that you have taken sooooo long to get. And of course, before you can land on it, your 'friend' gets there before you and steals it!

4. The Sprite

A USELESS POINTLESS LITTLE CHARACTER. Must hold the record for the character that dies the quickest: just four turns and boom...

5. The Priest

So not only are his powers pretty useless but what are the chances that every time I have used him as a character, he (a) gets repeatedly drunk and (b) proceeds to fight a farmer which (c) results him passing out somewhere and dying. Six turns, this time (two more than the sprite but hey!)

6. Trapped between two monsters...

Yes, that awkward moment at the beginning of the game where your strength and craft are crap, and you are on a square between a Demon and a Dragon. Argh! Which way to go!? Either way, death is the result!

7. Wicked Thievery!

Yes, here's always one player who just has to be clever. So you reach the Portal of Power and are ready to go in when suddenly they whip out that spell that forces you to immediately discard your Talisman and go and look for another one. Great. Just great.

8. The Hag

It's all going well until you draw the dreaded Hag. All your followers immediately abandon you. Yes, even the beloved horse and cart. And the worse thing. You are in the Middle Region and have to get your ass all the way back to the Village Mystic!

9. Getting to the Middle Region

All your friends are there and there you are stuck with a pathetic craft and pathetic strength with no hope of beating the sentinal and no money to get a raft or an axe. Fantastic...

10. Never-ending game

Yes, rather than play the game properly, there's always one person that has to make it their life's mission to make everybody else's lives miserable. A little spell here, a little combat there. Yes, you know who you are! With no intention of actually winning the game, you can easily get locked into a cycle of ten hour game play. Yes, I know from experience!

BUT LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE

Picasa http://2.7

Things could be worse. At least, we have Lemmy Kilminster to help us...